This day and the days to follow you will read and watch many posts,about eclipses and moons and retrogrades and crystalline light and invoking intentions and ascended masters. You will hear much about sudden endings and eruptions and breakups and breakdowns. Karma and evolution and enlightenment - the words will relentlessly circle social media and the galaxy!
But what's it all really about? What the hell does this energy want from us? Why is it ringng us out and forcing our choices? You may be asking yourself, why am I so emotional?
Why is this happening?
Well the universe wants our attention...and so does our higher self. But why?, We fight and resist and finally succumb to our discomfort when the tears come. We are exhausted from all this energy demands from us.
And still what's it all about..the loss of appetite, the restless sleep, the vivid dreams ,...and why the hell is the sky so blue today ..never saw that blue before....and my sense of smell- I think I just smelled grandma but she's dead, and yeah what about those sunsets, can't describe those colors, and OMG I just ran into somebody I haven't seen in 10 years and how did that card fall out of that book....and why am i crying over something that happened years ago, yup I get it....and, Yeah its all happening...
No matter how you sum it up, astrologically, spiritually, religiously, mentally, or ignorantly.. Its all about one thing.
This energy is about our power and it is demanding we step into the responsibility of its proper care and feeding. Yes, you heard right- this energy wants us to feed our power!
If you feel great and on track its because the universe is showing you where your power lies. If you are miserable the universe is showing you where you lose your power.
Think about that a minute, yup that's right, its true isn't it?
When we are in our power in sync with the light inside us, listening to our souls desire, the truth is we are pretty happy creatures. When we release or hand our power over to things and situations and others and don't take responsibility for our light within we are really miserable creatures. That's why I was happiest in the summer of 2015 bumming around fire island doing reiki and readings with no job or money just breathing doing yoga and grateful nobody in my life was pissing me off. I had swept my road clean of all the stuff that was torturing me and decided to just be with me and my soul. I bravely jumped off a cliff and left all "safe" things behind. Good call! It didb't take me long to realize all those "safe" things had been strangling me for years! Cutting off my air supply and restricting my spirit! I learned things most people never do and I met the most fantastic person I never knew. ME!
I really got to know her and she's a pretty cool chick. That alone gave me everything I needed, the power to live the rest of my life satisfied. Its very cool Knowing what's 'Enough' ....btw I am enough...
See, we confuse power with control. One is security the other is restriction. The journey to freedom is understanding which is which. Only in our own power are we safe. Control and the need of it is fear. Fear restricts us and holds us back from our power.
That's why we stay in the illusion that we are 'safe' in situations that are harmful, stressful jobs, addictions, bad partnerships. Our fear restricts us so bad,we can't see truth. And that's what this energy is... It is reality, plain and simple. and we spend so much time avoiding certain reality that they are giving us a spanking now...and we really don't like it!
Yes - Reality, spontaneous and harsh reality. Why? To wake us the hell up and make us powerful.
This energy is shaking us up to show us those truths we avoid.
I spent many years in solitude confronting fear, I lost alot of stuff I didn't want to.Let go of alot of people I love. Walked away from some really cool but not good for me stuff. I'm sure most of it still has my claw marks on it..lol. I learned through terrible pain. And I am writing this in the hopes of sparing someone that pain:
We are the mediators of our own reality. We sit between dark and light bargaining and creating a psuedo life trying not to face things that are scary in the dark. And that is just a big waste of time. Nothing is as scary as you think it is, our fear amplifies our illusions. And yet we put a barrier between seeing truth. That veil we put up in front of ourselves to keep us safe is actually separating us from the awareness of a reality that holds all our keys. That veil that has separated us from our worst fears is invisible now.. This energy, these eclipses and retrogrades are thinning the veil so sheer we have to look at reality. The veil is barely protecting us anymore. We can no longer escape, the light is so bright it pierces all and makes the veil fall away. We have to look at the good, the bad and the ugly, we have no choice. This light makes us dominant over our own intuition and we can no longer turn away from truth. It begs us to step into our power it propels us forward by lighting under the veil all our illusions. This is a painful process but It brings understanding and knowledge like never before. It is a sometimes grueling process but it is happening and you can't stop it. The only way is go through it. And many many of us bravely do so to enjoy a life filled with bliss and peace. You can triumph and live aligned in this sweet reality to , don't let your fear stop you. Step into your power!
What does this energy want from us?
Once you understand and feel your power you must bring it to the world, not to control but to educate and empower. Just like the High Priestess pictured here from the Tarot Card, this is our opportunity to take control and rule our own destiny. Then reach out and help others by showing them how to do the same. In sharing the experience we bring truth to the collective of our race. We all become more powerful. Unified in reality and truth which the light has shown us by lifting the veil of our illusions.
In this light the human race is evolving as never before. Ultimetly, to live in love not a fear based mentality! But it starts with each of us on an individual level facing fear, breaking it down, breaking through the restriction, to break out and put our mark on the world. No easy task...so we don't sleep so good, so we lose a partner or quit a job in the scheme of things its pretty silly that we let it all control our lives when there us a much bigger shift happening.
I know its hard but don't fear the unknown. Its just someplace you have not discovered yet we make it bad because we are in fear. That illusion casts darkness. That is why we often get more of the same challenges and get stuck in a circle. We create that. We lose power. When we step into the light and harness power we change our outcome to positive. In this we heal each other and we can all heal the world. Peace and love Georgia Rose
This weekend we have a GRAND WATER TRINE = AS THE CANCER SUN TRINES NEPTUNE IN PISCES AND JUPITER IN SCORPIO they form a triangle in the sky or "trine". Trines are harmonious.. As Jupiter expands the light of the sun and both planets highlight dreamy and psychic Neptune we get a respite from the intense energy that we have been processing. Some of us will feel better able to cope and process this week. We also have a grand cross formation which can bring jarring and unexpected news but the Grand Trine will help with it's processing. Take time to nest with friends and family, stay close to home,or go out locally in nature, the beach the park and observe and trust what is coming up for you.I describe more spiritually in my lengthy post below. This is a powerful summer of endings,beginnings and many illusions broken. Trust! It all ends well my lovelies so let it flow and trust! Sending love to all Georgia Rose
THE HEART KNOWS...
It has come to my attention that there are things we create and there are things that are divinely created. We create out of need, want , desire, those things that satisfy our own cravings, Our need for love. Happiness and safety is sometimes settled, fed and satisfied by relationships, objects, and sensations we create so we don't feel the hunger, thirst, loneliness or hollow of our pain and discomfort. We fill our life with these things, created just so we don't have to deal with any of the emotions that are a consequence of our lack. More times than not, these things created by our own doing put us in confusion, stress and discomfort as we try to fit the illusion of their "rightness" into our lives and hearts and souls.
But the heart knows...
Like a beautiful shoe we can't resist wearing, even though they are a size too small - we suck up the blisters for awhile telling ourselves how "pretty " and "hot " they are. We will break them in and they will fit just fine sooner or later... We simply can't live without them! The degree to which we will suffer through for fashions sake is different for each of us. Some of us will break free of this illusion at first skin rub. others of us need bloody heels and stinging pain to catch on. THESE SHOES DON'T FIT! The heart knew all along, we just were not ready for the disappointment! We get mad and sad when we realize it was all just an illusion.
Illusions are necessary to the human condition. Sometimes they are the period of adjustment we need to chew our food instead of choking on a big bite, trying to consume life and our truth all at once doesn't work for us. While we chew, we learn what is too much and what is enough. Its all training for knowing what is real vs. unreal.
Ahh but always...
The heart knows. The soul knows. Before we are ready to listen we waste an inordinate amount of time silencing their voice, distracting ourselves with our illusion trying to convince ourselves of the "rightness" we glimpsed at it's creation. Finally we realize this shoe was not created for us but created by us...big difference huh?
Breaking free of illusion is painful and beautiful. Freedom is often like that! A bittersweet shower that washes silver down the drain to reveal our gold.
Illusions feel great when created and awful when lived. The things we think are security end up restrictions bringing us down into frustration and sadness forcing emptiness and dissatisfaction into our hearts. Sometimes we even feel unloved and neglected as our hearts squeeze shut. Illusions always separate us from the divine plan and purpose of our life. This is because we create illusion from fear. Something created from a negative energy will NEVER be positive.
Then in contrast, there are those things divinely created. These relationships, circumstances and possessions are truly "right" based in truth and right action.They are created by God, Creator to feed us deeply , nourish our spirit, enlighten our thoughts and ignite our hearts. They move us forward, not hold us in place. We are often powerless over these moments of creation, they catch us off guard, yet feel familiar. We do not create them they just ARE. They feel good from the start. Their ignition is not forced or manipulated or lusted for. The ignition has a positive key easily fitting, simply sliding into place in an open heart. We don't have to push and pull and prod these things and relationships into place. The work we do with them feels productive and satisfying.
How do divine things come to us? How do they happen?
How do we discern what is illusion created by us and what is real created for us?
WE open our hearts...remember the heart knows...
When we open our hearts we see truth. An open heart sees the meaningful. When our hearts are closed we create illusion to assimilate the things only an open heart can find. We create non genuine things that appear genuine for a brief time. But when our hearts are open so wide we can't ignore them, we are given genuine truth. Our lives become real. We gain a forward moment to creation and we become unstoppable!
In illusion we try to create love, peace , satisfaction in relationships to feel full. We look for completion driven by a lack created by fear, We look for this in the other who is driven by the same. You can't make positive from negative. Fear itself is an illusion. You can't make real from the unreal. You can't make meaningful from meaningless.
The heart knows...but we are stubborn, we want to control it all we want to "find" it so in our illusion we create it.
When we create from a wide open heart we create what is "real". In co creation with Spirit, God, Creator, by opening our hearts to create with HIM good things "find" us.
In this things are orchestrated by a universe that loves us unconditionally through no machinations of our own. The universe in its wisdom and love wants to show us the "real".
Divinely orchestrated and co created things rise us up, bring bliss, encourage us, bring us unity and deeper connection with our hearts. Those random conversations of total connection, the right place right time moments, the I can't believe this is happening experiences with no fear or doubt! When we are able to deeply listen to the heart we get more of this. THIS IS ENLIGHTENMENT.
Enlightenment brings us the capacity to separate illusion from real. And in reality our truth becomes divinely created and co created between us and God. A charmed life so to speak!
Of course the human experience is not always high vibes and lollipops even for the enlightened. We suffer. But it is because of our illusions we suffer. God does not create pain or suffering - we do.
By letting go of illusion and co creating with God we become the Alchemist changing and transmuting the energy in our lives to positive not negative.We become complete and no longer in need of escape and we create less illusions and more love. We find our bodies . mind, soul and business/ careers prosper and are healthy because we have aligned with truth and we are creating from positive energy not negative emotions.
2 things to live by:
1. I CAN NOT REALIZE THE FULLNESS OF MY NATURE UNTIL I BREAK FREE FROM THE ILLUSIONS THAT RESTRAIN ME. Georgia Rose 7/6/18
2. SOMEONE WHO BREAKS MY ILLUSION HAS OPENED UP A SPONTANEOUS AND MEANINGFUL REALITY FOR ME. -THANK THEM! Georgia Rose 7/6/18
Stop living an incomplete life imprisoned by your illusions. Co create with enlightenment and know you can manifest it all. Be complete and free! My videos and blog are created for this purpose. Transmuting from the unreal to the real! Yes we can have it all ! y♥ <3 Peace and love Georgia Rose
THURSDAY JUNE 28, 2018...AN ORDINARY YET EXTRAORDINARY DAY! I woke up on this day feeling a heavy loneliness, a feeling of separation ...of no one to love me. Although friends and my partner are always bopping on and out, there is no one in my life that comes home or I come home to, no one is coming home here but me, no kids, no parents, no spouse..sometimes it is a very long time between hugs and I have few that say "I love you". My heart hurt with the grief of it. I remembered how it was for many painful years when these feelings ate me alive..that grief, that hollow, where I lived. I write about those times and the slow painful transformation to these times in this blog.
I found the key, the truth of all that... I know now.. I am never alone..I have the love of creator, my angels, and many in the world that I feel love from. My life is devoted to healing that pain of separation in the world through the mission that is Georgia Rose Connection.
Nonetheless the feeling was heavy this day and I was trying to shake it off going through my daily paces. I stood at my kitchen counter preparing my lunch to take to work and said a silent prayer to God to help me not feel thus. This song came on. ..an answer right from Spirit.
I realized He answered me directly and as I felt our profound connection in my heart, a tear slid down my face. As always after I feel his grace I felt the connection with the world. I looked up and out my kitchen window and spotted my neighbors daughter pull into her Moms driveway to drop her children for Mom to babysit as she does daily before work. I saw these adorable toddlers in their little rain coats and umbrellas run up the path to Grandmas door. I felt their joy and I knew when Grandma's door opened she would surely embrace them in tight hugs. And I said a prayer of gratitude that Spirit allowed me to witness such love and synchronicity and to know love is all around me if I but pay attention. My mood changed and I felt love and loved all day.
My lessons of love did not end there. All day signs kept coming..it ended with a Reiki circle scheduled for that evening with my Breast Cancer group where some amazing messages from Spirit came through but I will write about that in another post.
For now just keep your heads up my lovelies and pay attention to all the love that surrounds you, because you are never alone! Peace and love Georgia Rose
Below is a preview from my forthcoming book.
THE CANCER MESSAGES by Georgia Rose
My beloved Aunt Loretta was like a second Mother to me and my siblings. She lived with us our whole life. “Aunty” read to us and taught us about the literary classics and all kinds of sophisticated and grown up things. She read me Aesop’s fables and took us to Broadway shows and helped us with our math homework.
She was a kind soul who often when out of her way to help others but suffered from much anxiety and so was not very good at helping herself. Her nervous condition limited her and manifested in many ways throughout her life. One of which was, she never became the published writer she wanted to be and in fact many things started during her lifetime were sadly never completed. That happens to many of us who find ourselves anxious and living in fear. Fear of life, fear of the freedom we crave, fear of success and fear of failure leaves us in a self-imposed prison where we are often too paralyzed to do anything with our life.
Growing up I had many fears and anxiety much like Aunty. I am afraid that when Aunty got cancer the me I always saw in her was suddenly hopeless and too much to examine.
I remember the exact moment I knew she was dying. My sister and I had been taking turns driving her to treatment for her cancer. On one of the days when it was my turn to chauffeur Aunty, afterwards I asked if she would like to stop for a bite to eat. She perked up at the idea and we stopped in to her favorite Pancake Cottage. She ordered her favorite pancakes and coffee.
We sat eating, chatting in quiet tones, she had lost a lot of weight and was very weary and sick. She took a sip of her coffee and it came out of her nose. Then more fluid came flowing out. There was all this grey matter that just kept running out of her nose and she kept trying to wipe it away and it was all just so bizarre. I stared speechless and her hazel grey eyes met mine with the most helpless look I had ever seen on another human being in my life. In that instance, I knew her body was betraying her, shutting down against her will and against my will too. The universe was screaming, it didn’t matter what anyone of us on this earth wanted. She was dying.
I sat in this innocuous diner having a life altering moment that stopped me in my tracks, yet all around me life kept moving as though it was nothing. I looked into those helpless grey eyes so filled with fear, and they mirrored all the emotions I felt. Our eyes clicked with the prick of electricity and sensations of lightning awareness flashed between she and I. As the chasm of space between life and death closed it was way too real. My emotions overwhelmed me and so I did what I was taught – I hid them for her sake. And maybe for my sake too because I was so very afraid.
I clicked into detachment and I pretended none of it was happening. But it was happening – unfortunately.
Aunty ended up in the hospital a few days later and things happened very quickly and pretty much without me after that.
I couldn’t bear the thought that I would end up like her. That the me I always saw in her would die incomplete, unhappy, unfulfilled. It ate my insides out. I had so much fear and anxiety in my own life that I would end up like Aunty. With not much of her own except the stories in books and her own unlived dreams, her was a sad life.
After that day at the pancake cottage I didn’t help much with her care. Once she was in the hospital actively dying I went to visit her and upon seeing all the tubes and my mother crying by the bed I left.
I walked down the hall and made a conscious decision to never go back. I told everyone that I didn’t want to see her that way and I would remember our precious Aunt in other ways.
The truth was I was a coward. I wasn’t there for my Mom in her sorrow. I wasn’t there for my siblings in their time of loss. Nor did I allow anyone to comfort me in my despair. I “didn’t get it”. I ran away and detached from it all. I buried my fear and grief. I didn’t tell anyone how I felt and didn’t ask anyone how they were feeling either.
I was terrified of cancer, of death and worse of living an unfulfilled life. I never grieved Aunty. Cancer took her life and my courage with it. But even as it did this, it taught me still. Yes, cancer once again taught me well.
Through my detachment I still felt strongly that I wanted to honor Aunties life in some way by finishing a dream of my own. It was the only way I could give myself hope and worthiness. If I could complete something it would break the cycle of fear and incompletion and loss.
When Aunty was dying I was attending classes to get my real estate license. This had been a dream for a long time and I was determined to stick it out and pass the licensing exam. Coincidentally a few days after Aunties death I took the test and passed. I got my license, on January 22. 1995 and that day I dedicated my career to Aunty. I had finished something in honor of all the things she couldn’t finish. For her, I would be a success and show the world that little girls who grew up abandoned by their fathers, too anxious and scared to live normal lives and chase their dreams, could flourish and be worthy of more.
I did this privately and never told a soul. Often during a disappointment or career slump I would go back to my original vow and it would pull me through. Thinking of Aunty and my promise to her to succeed would spur me on.
Cancer taught me it is a thief in the night, a dream robber, a succubus. But it doesn’t have to be if we pick up another’s torch and honor what it stands for. Then cancer doesn’t snuff it all out. Instead a seed grows for something greater in another heart when it picks up the torch left behind by the soul who carried it before.
The last time I saw my Aunt alive she was in the hospital intubated, unable to speak but awake. Her familiar grey eyes told me more than I wanted to know as I sat by her bed. We communicated with no words that day. I sat silently by her bed for a long time. Finally, after a while I hung my head and closed my eyes as sadness overtook me. I felt ashamed because I knew I wasn’t coming back. It was too much for me. When I looked up at Aunty tears were rolling down her face. I couldn’t come back. She knew and understood what I was feeling. I felt her heart speak to mine then and I was filled with love and forgiveness.
Cancer had ravaged her body but we both connected on another dimension. I felt her thoughts and she mine as we sat there. Cancer was once again bridging the realms for me. The dis ease the harbinger of transformation has a divine nature. It is a corridor that somehow connects us to joy and suffering and GOD. The mystery of creation and death solved when it is understood the two are unified. Polarity in its purest form. A conjunction of beginning and end vying for the same space.
Sometimes after Aunt’s death I would feel her or dream of her. It would frighten me. Before I was spiritual enough to understand it would give me chills and I would run to turn on the lights. But as years past, and I opened myself to study the higher self and universal energy, I came to understand the truth about those sensations. I now find comfort in the presence of past loved ones. Love is limitless, and we can feel it across the realms.
It was my experiences once opened to energy that made me realize our ability to communicate with our minds as Aunty and I did that day in her hospital room. I now have enjoyed that experience with many.
Years after Aunt’s death she would teach me a very significant lesson about how our loved one’s can reach out to show us their presence.
One holiday I was attending a family dinner at my sister Laura’s house. Laura is not a believer in energy transcending realms or anything “unseen” and much of it makes her uncomfortable. By this time, I was not only open to energy but was a Healer and doing readings and spirit communication professionally. This had become the main source of love and joy in my life. Working in the Spirit realms and feeling our Creators presence brought me alignment with my purpose. But I had some doubt about pursuing it further and still had a corporate world job and “normal” life. At times I would wonder how I could ever Segway into my spiritual work full time. I had much self-doubt that would ever be a reality, as much as I loved the idea.
However, I did not speak of these things around my sister and sort of just avoided all things spiritual when around the family. I was usually quite careful to sensor myself and I never wore crystals when attending family gatherings. But for some reason that day at my sister’s holiday dinner I wore a beautiful quartz crystal pendant. Sure, enough she remarked on it!
“Oh No”, I thought here it comes an afternoon of comments and side glances but instead she complimented it and then dismissed it. “Hmm”, now that was very strange. My sister was never supportive and barely ever non chalant about these things.
During desert I noticed Laura’s absence. Now this was totally out of character. You see, my sister is an expert baker and prepares deserts for weeks before the holidays. Desert is the highpoint of the year at her home! There is no way she would not be at the table during desert. It was just plain weird.
Before long she came back to the dining room carrying a small red pouch. “I think you should have these”, she said and handed them to me. I opened the pouch and inside were 4 beautiful crystals - a clear quartz entwined with silver dolphins, a chakra crystal, an amethyst pendant and a jade stone. As I finger them in my hand, puzzled, Laura said “They were Aunt’s” . “Aunty’s” I exclaimed, “I never saw these, but how”!
“Right before she died, she used to go to this spiritual shop in the village and buy stuff. Yeah, she got real spiritual and stuff then”, Laura said, very matter of fact, as though it was common family knowledge. Which let me assure you it was not.
I held the treasures and tears sprang to me eyes as I felt Aunty in a rush. I saw those beautiful hazel eyes, the helpless eyes that met mine that day at the pancake cottage and the knowing eyes so filled with love that day of our final visit in the hospital before she died. I never knew she sought solace in Spirit in things that are unseen, connecting with crystals and energy. As a silly selfish girl afraid of death, I ran away from Aunty’s final days. I missed out on what could have been a loving connection to Spirit years before I finally found my own way to Him.
Finally, I reasoned I wasn’t meant to have that lesson and connection with Aunty back then. I would not have understood it. I was meant to learn about transition and crystals much later. It was all priming me for this more meaningful moment.
When Aunty died I tried to find solace and solutions in the physical world. I did not know any other way. I used the physical world to honor a woman whose life was filled with “I cant’s” with an “I will”. I dedicated a successful Real Estate career in the 3D world to her and succeeded. It was my way of finding reconciliation with her death.
Aunty’s cancer, her death, in effect gave me a career. Yes, the divine disease that takes so much gave me the inspiration to make something of my life. By turning my fear and loss into a productive and honorable outlet I thrived on the physical plane of this world. I used that platform to serve many and as my soul developed it became a vehicle for me to give back to my community and grow the foundation of my altruistic nature.
Now, 22 years later my soul was at a cross roads. I was trying to leave behind my physical career for one that communed with Spirit in the nonphysical world. Unsure of my path and filled with self-doubt a sign had come from beyond. As I sat was holding the mysterious crystals hat belonged to the woman who had inspired my career path 22 years ago. The beautiful Aunt I had honored by completing a dream was sending me a message to complete yet another dream, inspiring me further in my divine purpose. Aunty’s love and faith in me was bridging the realms with a divine gift that anchored me in the limitless and unconditional love of God. It was a strong reminder that we can turn our cants into cans and that we are all beautiful, strong and invincible.
I realized cancer teaches us our greatest strengths and even those it consumes on this earth, live on to become invincible teaching us for eternity.
MY LIFE: From 1995 - 2010 I was purpose driven. Amassing all the material things one could have and achieving all the goals I set for myself in my business. I was and still am a driven person. I missed a lot in those years- birthdays and weddings and friendships that fell by the wayside because I had no time. I even forgot my own wedding anniversary once.
A beautiful life grew out of control as the pressure to perform mounted. By 2010 the pressure had grown to my breaking point - it was almost impossible to do all I had to in a normal day. I owned rental houses and flipped properties, I had 2 real estate offices and many many employees, an electrical contracting business and 2 sick elderly parents, a demanding husband and way too many things. Life was unraveling. When I lost my parents and I got cancer, things began to change inside me. As life and grief does to many of us it shifted me. The Universe slowed me so I could see clearly.
Cancer was my awakening. It was the tipping point that brought incredible loss and incredible triumph. I learned a deeper way of life and realized that I had not ever been fully present before. When faced with ones own mortality and impermanence shit gets real! I became understanding of a heart I had ignored, I embraced the vulnerability and fear I had always squashed with steely resolve. As I had to depend on the kindness of strangers to save my life - I felt my human condition in the soft places where I had before pretended to be super human. My determination was now to feel all the things I had been determined to make numb before. For the first time, I allowed myself deep breath and introspection. I began a journey steered by my heart. I left the safety of a ship my ego created and went swimming for a better one with real meaning. I dove deep into an ocean. I found a life that was finally about me, not the doing and getting and chasing and pleasing of the others. I slowly slowly stopped the wheel of shame and grief that had been silently invisibly spinning me all my life. I now saw what was visible. I now saw life was about more and that we are not driven by purpose but we become the purpose we are meant to be.
By finding myself - the real one not the one running from my fears, I found purpose. Purpose that had its root in the world not just me. My purpose became to put love where there is none. By 2014 I had completely stopped the world as I had previously known it. I meditated and did healings and connected with readings and took months off, no work, no schedule and no one to please, and nothing to do. It was beautiful to do "nothing" but feed my spirit and let my psychic gifts come forward unleashed. I backpacked and walked by the ocean ate ice cream and took naps and continued my spiritual studies full on. I met amazing people and traveled and danced and laughed and did Yoga. Nothing drove me but what my heart wanted. After such a high powered life in the 3D world I had fully achieved 5D status! it was amazing and free.
But I am an extreme person. So, eventually as it had before the pendulum swung too much in the opposite direction. I started to grow lazy and too soft without any structure at all I was a bit lost yet completely grounded. But I had no plan no future direction and that did not feel right. Money was getting low and I was sleeping in too much and getting bored. I started to question my bohemian hippy like indulgences and realize I needed balance of some kind. Was I being wasteful of my talents? Should I be out in the world more?
Of course, that is when the Universe unexpectedly called. It made me an offer I could not refuse. An offer that gave me stability and the chance to blend my old high powered career with my heart. It offered a way to help people achieve goals and empower lives while gaining financial stability. I was a bit hesitant - this would entrench me back in the 3 D world and I had this fantasy of working in the 5th dimension.
I decided to do it. I dusted off my suits and hung up my back pack to go back to the rooms where I had once been. The rooms where egos are grown and deals are made and people jockey for recognition on the throne of competition. I took the position I currently work at. I challenged myself to go back to the halls of "me first" and " fight to the death" and bring a different energy there. I challenged myself to go there and remain me - true to my soul.
I promised I would find a way to do both.
My personal office sits in the middle of sterile and bland corporate America. It is decorated beautifully with inspiring quotes and pretty pictures and low lighting and meditation music playing all day. It doesn't really fit in with the motif. And I don't care! It is a real place in a world of the unreal. It is an oasis in the desert. Strange things happen here.
Officially on the outside anyone walking in would see an executive. I am looked up to and sought after for career advice, I am Senior Vice President and I settle disputes and make decisions and train and educate. But to be honest none of that means much to me except that I am proud of my hard work and grateful God gave me the brain I have. Other than that it has no significance for me.
What is significant to me is that since taking the position I have done things I never did at work before. People are somehow drawn to me and my space. I find myself often drying tears, listening to personal stories, inspiring change, lighting a way, changing lives. Co workers - light workers in disguise are coming in asking "you are a healer, aren't you"? "You seem to know things" "You have an energy about you" "who are you". Among us there are reiki workers, psychics, feng shui experts, seers, visionaries etc... some days my mouth hangs open in disbelief. The things and synchronicity that occur are unbelievable.
I sit in my little corner of the world and I see it all unfolding before me. This new world. It is our world the world of every one of us and it is not about me or you it is about US!
I marvel at where God has brought me. Some days just when the 3D world seems to be strangling me something occurs that shows me I am meant to be here for now. The pixie dust is raining down on me, this place and everyone in it. And I know it is that way in many places such as this all over the universe.
The first holiday season I was here there were no decorations and not much cheer except the obligatory office party which was a rather solemn affair. This past year there was a big tree and decorations and merry making and silly pictures and love. Its flowing here now with laughter and compassion is finding its way in. It is beautiful to watch.
There are times I am still the barracuda in the business world when I have to be,but now I do so always being true to my heart.
I still go home and meditate and do my Reiki circles and readings. I make time to write the books soon to be published. At times the 3D world demands more of my attention than I want it to, like when I have a quarterly meeting event or deadline. I neglect calling friends back and I miss things I would like to do , I fall behind on my writing and spiritual studies. I know that is wrong friends get mad and I get frustrated. In my humanness I must sometimes choose and my choices are not infallible. But I usually correct that as soon as I am able. I am still trying to find balance. I try to stay true to my goal of creating a spiritual community and inspiring the world through writing and video. The time I spend at this endeavor is my classroom and my content platform. I am building my audience my followers and creating the space that hopefully will eventually allow that goal. I am on my path.
My path is like many. Whatever our daily life is we can bring our spirit to it and enlighten ourselves and others just by being love. That is the purpose of this world. I understand that now. Whether we do that on a mountaintop or wherever. Love the place you're in!
The other day a woman came up to me in the ladies room and said "You know you changed my life, that conversation we had a few months ago". I'd be lying if I said this high powered executive barracuda didn't lock herself in a stall and start crying. I was crying because it was a beautiful moment. But mostly I cried because I felt so blessed that God gave me such a fulfilling life. I have cried from shame and jealousy and loss. I have grieved so much I thought I had no tears left. Out of all those tears shed, the ones I feel the most deeply are the tears of humility. I am so humbled that I get to see what is real in this world. I hardly deserve to see such beauty and yet I am rewarded with it often. That makes me cry the hardest to feel such GRACE!
And something tells me this scene is playing out all over corporate America and the world. The world is changing or maybe its always been this way and I never knew!
Sending the intention of beautiful heightened awareness out to all of you...
Peace and love,
FROM MY JOURNAL
Saturday October 11, 2014 - 4:42 PM
It's not easy to straddle these two worlds. I struggle at times. I could use the support, talks, insights of some of those friends and friendships that have fallen away. But it is not to be. Not today anyway. Today, I stand alone with one foot in each world. Trying to choose like a boomerang with no will, between old ego and new heart. Seeing inside the space between what curiously can't be real and is, and what I thought was real and is not. I sit here desolate with nothing to keep me company but the winds of change. Confused and lonely not sure where I am going. A breeze constantly swirls about me. I find a soft place under the tree of my life as it sheds its leaves of divine love upon me. The leaves swirl with understanding and with fear yet I play in them like a child enthralled yet leery. Meditation has become my amusement and my source of connection. It makes my life my teacher and friend. I wish to share it. The wonder and reward of it all deserves companions. This transformation deserves connection. Most times there are none.
I feel a curious sense of anticipation, like I am waiting for an old friend to arrive- yet at the same time there is a patient acceptance of time flowing as it should. My discomfort from the isolation and loneliness is becoming comfortable. I am not sure how that can be - it just is. I feel small as though I am a mere piece in a larger plan yet so special to be part of whatever plan is unfolding. I suffer yet I am pleased to be here. I realize this is transformation and for the first time in my life I am experiencing trust. I trust this time. I trust this experience. My soul can feel the old friend I await is peace. I know him not from this life but from before. Peace. He is coming...
I trust my suffering will end. I know my resurrection is somewhere behind all this pain. This mini crucifixion is not a curse. Faith tells me it is a blessing. I have chosen like so many others to transform into grace. The process is not for the weak of heart. I have been in turmoil for so long now. But In my darkest hours faith is beginning to replace fear. And so in those darkest hours I can now see the light of grace. The love of Spirit. I am starting to see the way out of this loneliness and shame I have felt forever. For the first time in my life there is calm. I now know what trust is. I trust myself.
I have come to understand I will always straddle two worlds. The real and the unreal, but now they have switched places. The things I can not see are more important and real than those I can. My strength does not come from what I can touch but what I feel. My authentic power comes from knowing everything in this moment is exactly as it should be. I accept my suffering. I accept my harmony. Home has become my heart and I can live anywhere trusting each moment.
I now know how to LET IT BE. I play that song daily - it is a meditation of sorts. It makes me feel in my core the sweet anticipation of the great things to come. Once your soul remembers its power the nights are not so dark and life becomes intensely beautiful even the suffering.
Thank you God for your grace. I cherish what you teach me and I promise to share it.
Peace and love,
I am a yogi. Yes, I consider myself that, even when I am out of my practice. "Out of my practice" means I am out of time or out of sync or simply doing "other work" and I neglect my ritual of aligning this soul and honoring this body. I miss my "normal" then. I am most home in the dimly lit rooms of incense and meditation music. My body craves a bare floor, the thin mat, the awakening of my limbs and the flashes of wisdom that come during Savasana. Yoga is my best friend and greatest teacher.
A lifestyle change made going to my yoga studio nearly impossible when I took a great career position but one that made me a 9-5er.
For the first time in forever I began to lead a sedentary life. Sitting behind a desk coming home to dinner and bed. After a year of this cycle, I was not only depressed in my mind and spirit but my body was soft and out of breath. I was desperate for the beautiful alignment of energy I was used to.
The practice of yoga had taught me so much about the merging of the soul with the physical body and with our mind. My current period of misalignment and deprivation taught me how powerful that alignment can be for every facet of our beautiful beings. Feeling out of alignment was awful. I was miserable. I felt sad, weak and started to become very negative and grumpy! I even found myself aggressive in traffic and eye rolling at people's comments. Who was I becoming?
I realized I felt complete restriction. Not only was I not moving my body, I wasn't living to my full potential. My mind and spirit had no expansion. I was not in a structured routine, but in a sad rut! Time kept passing this way and soon I was in this routine for 2 years.
Something had to change. I craved fresh air and freedom but was often to tired to even walk in the park. I needed something- so I booked a vacation. It dawned on me one day as I carried my heavy briefcase into the office and got out of breath doing so, that traveling and carrying luggage may be difficult.
For some odd reason Spirit directed me to start "working out". Yes, working out... like at a real gym. "But, I am a yogi", I thought, "peaceful and quiet in my practice".
It was a silly moment... Part of me will never learn not to argue with Spirit!
So, of course, I found myself in the gym. Upon arriving my first thoughts were- it is very bright and few people are smiling and no one hugs you. Very different from the yoga studio and its loving community. Loud music is constantly pulsating- no Dueter or Steven Halpern here....
This place is about appearance and sculpture and the way you look to other people. Its about muscle definition and healthy bodies. Its about achieving goals and pushing limits, its about judgement and flaws. BUT in deeper study it has much in common with yoga. They both focus on sensation and teach you about your body and mind and soul ...if you let them.
Neither one is good or bad, better or worse for you - its about what you need, when you need and what works for you based on where you are in your life. I realize this is why Spirit brought me here. To see another side in my personal development. This is another significant side to my evolution. I open to the experience and decide to honor whatever wisdom awaits me here.
I accept, observe, explore and I don't resist. I want to make the best of my time here in this bright noisy place and optimize this lesson. Since I am an extreme personality- I hire a personal trainer ( thank you 9-5 job) . May as well go for it! I observe the synchronicity and irony in that.
Soon...Early mornings are spent on machines and doing squats and lifting weights. My trainer is as adept at seeing the signs and sensations of my breath and movement as any yogi. I tune in as I would in the ashram and find sensations and muscle energy I never felt before. My mind starts to open and my heart starts to connect like it used to in the slow methodical movements of a yoga flow just with a bit more speed and assertion. These are very different feelings and reactions but no less satisfying. It isn't long before I find metaphor here for my life, just as I have for years in my yoga practice.
Here too in the bright, noisy, crowded place I find in myself the courage to try, the determination to push, the will to feel more and the awakening to understand what this is teaching me thru my physical energy. My body becomes a blackboard for my mind, writing lessons on my limbs and muscles that are really for my spirit. I realize this primer has been the same for eons. My ancestors have learned the same way. For centuries man has struggled and triumphed on yoga mats and swinging hammers, through tai chi and weight lifting, by martial arts and Olympics. It is all the same.
Connection. Movement. Breathe. Life. Human. Body. Wisdom. Spirit. Alignment.
We find wisdom in the quickening of our breathe and the joy of breaking boundaries. We realize life can be limitless if we choose to break the leashes we put around our own necks. When can'ts become cans even in the smallest way, we learn so much. We expand every part of ourselves in this place. The rewards are deep and personal. They put us in balance with ourselves and our own worth.
It becomes little about the waist line and the tight ass and more about our interior and self worth based on strength and alignment with the gift of this precious life. Every breath every movement becomes a tribute of gratitude as we honor our whole body not just the physical vessel. It's all so much deeper than that.
I am a yogi. I labeled myself that. I was intimidated by the bright lights of that gym. My yoga practice was so personal I thought it was reserved for those dimly lit rooms with exotic music and incense. I couldn't picture myself sweating in the 3D world with a headset blaring music. Such judgement of myself served NO purpose. It is a lesson I carry over now to many things. Especially evident as I have "aha" moments on the elliptical with Eminem blasting. Those moments are no less profound than the ones I have in yoga with singing bowls aligning my flow. Life has many flavors- if you open your mouth to taste. We must open the mouth of our home of chi - life!
My trainer works me hard. Sometimes she will say "ok you are done" if she sees me in challenge with a task even if I have a couple of reps left. I often say to her "NO, I will finish because I must honor my body." Pushing limits is the same in every aspect of your life and it has wonderful rewards.
I remember the second day I was at the gym and my trainer took me over to the elliptical machine. I never did the elliptical in my whole life. I would watch others on it and just know I was the one who would break my neck and make a fool of myself on that contraption. With horror I said "OH NO! That is the boogey man of the gym". She laughed but I was serious. She made me do it. I hated it, it was so hard! I feared losing my grip or footing and flying into the next aisle in a heap of vertigo and bruises. But something inside me made me want to conquer it and with her showing me I felt like I could. And as always when your mind thinks you have a chance- your spirit takes over and soon the body responds. And so, I did it, I conquered the "boogeyman".
I have conquered many boogeymen in my life - but conquering that machine reminded me who I was. In fact now I do about 30 minutes on it daily with no prompting I reach for it myself and kind of enjoy it. That is a wow! For years I have been safely restricted on a treadmill watching people on that Elliptical from afar. What a great lesson!
I look around my gym ( yes I said MY gym) and there are all shapes and sizes, ages and sexes. I don't think working out is as much about appearance as people think. I think it is about mind and spirit for most people. Just ask the 80 year old who treadmills and goes to Zumba.
Yoga was never about the way I looked. It was always about expanding my emotional and spiritual essence and becoming content and peaceful in accepting myself and others without judgement and anxiety. It teaches me to be strong in every way through physical movement. In fact, yoga taught me to detach from compliments and criticism equally. By understanding the difference between the real and unreal. No one's opinion or judgement on my appearance makes any difference to me at all. For me, life became about feeling and sensation. Even what I take in my body for sustenance is not about taste but about how it makes me feel. I rarely crave anything when I am in alignment with my mind. body. spirit.
I had judged the gym to be unreal and superficial and in some ways I feared it. I now love the gym and I have a goal that is a metaphor for my life. I find many of the same benefits I did from yoga just in a different flavor. I am building my physical body to accomplish this certain goal and will write about it when I have done so. I now have incorporated yoga into my routine too. How beautiful it is to cross the bridge to both.
I am a not only yogi and not only a gym rat I am a beautiful human who no longer lives by labels or appearances. I now realize nothing is at it appears. Judgments are fear. Limits are illusions. And most of all it is not about how life looks but the significance it brings you when you look a little deeper and open to it!
Peace and love,
It is said the journey from the head to the heart is the longest journey. That may be true. It takes a long time and many miles to merge ego and soul, but it can not be measured by either clock or kilometers. It's length is metered out by the yards of connections that pave the road from cool thoughtful logic to pumping hot emotion and back again. The circular drive older than our incarnation. In fact, as old as creation itself. Our universe all began with a spark of light, created when thought met emotion. All this from that. All that within each of us.
I have been heartless at times. When ego ruled hard from quick cold logic and softer "weaker" feelings were smothered under shovels of heavy conditioning and "supposed to be's". Goals were written for me and never sincere. "Never let them see you sweat", "Be an example" and "There is no such word as can't", "Keep crying and I will give you something to cry about" were the childhood mantras that molded my survival and safe identity. It is natural I developed a steely determination and over achievement that pushed out all empathy. My Father wanted it so. His own fear of vulnerability raised a very strong daughter. Success was gained, goals met, wars won, but I never really felt any of it. I lived only in my head, nothing ever traveled down much farther. I had a road block to the highway of my heart.
Many of us have road blocks. It's not until some lightning strikes our heart that we realize it. Lightning has many properties. It can bring joy or loss, burn or ignite. I suppose our individual " lightning" experiences have much to do with Karma and little to do with the way we think things "should be". You see, lightning is always unexpected and powerful. It's electric and its main purpose is to get our attention and shed light on something before plunging us back to the dark.
Some of us are deep in the dark and so we don't get a bolt of lightning we get a lightning storm to wake us from the depths of our apathy and judgement. I was a hard case, so I got a barrage, a lightning storm that lasted a long time.
In the end that intensity "lightened" my heart brighter. It gave me the capacity to love deeper. I have so much love now that I sometimes don't know what to do with it all. Yet, I would never trade that empathy for anything in the universe. I feel things now, deeply, wholeheartedly. The beauty from the emotions in my heart far outweighs anything my ego and mind ever accomplished.
Yes, the journey from head to heart is amazing and outrageous and so, so very hard- but it is our purpose.
Someone I once knew was in the struggle of this journey. His head prevented him from even saying the words "I love you". I imagine that is quite a painful road block. He once asked me "Do you think I am capable of love?"
Of course, I knew he was. I had felt it in his touch, seen it in his eyes and shared it in his deep laughter. I witnessed it in his gift of time with me and in his empathy for my dog and for me in my own times of need. He was steady and strong and kind, yet here he was doubting his capacity for what he was born to do. Love.
That doubt and fear blocked his road to love. I knew the traffic jam well, I had been around its bend. It took an army of angels and every ounce of courage I had to help me break through. My emotions from his question overwhelmed me so much. I could only hug him in response. I remember putting my hand on his back by his heart and quietly infusing my love there as he held me. I was gifting him with love that would stay on his journey even if I was no longer on his road. I wanted him to know deep abiding love with a partner. I hoped it would be me, but my love had no boundary and I more so hoped he would find it in whatever place he would know its amazing spirit and limitless joy. Love, you see, is not about me but simply about love. My heart simply wanted his heart to sing. My head was no where in sight and had no stake in the game.
MY road from head to heart was complete, unblocked and flowing for me. I could now never live any other way. From then on my love would flow freely in everything I did.
All the trauma I had..all the lightening that struck me opened my heart to feelings. Those experiences created my heart, filled it with recognizable sensations. Every lesson of forgiveness, love, empathy, compassion and joy whether harsh or gentle created my heart. All of it now flows from me for and into others so they too find their hearts. Every scar is a river bed where love flows up to meet another who has swum in the same river. Connections that we are meant to share. Connections that are the reason we are all united within each other. LOVE.
The journey from head to heart is paved by emotion. Paved by sadness and joy and loss and abundance. It is meant to teach us to feel. If you are in the struggle of this journey focus on your experiences. Step into the "lightning" to feel the Lightening. Do not fear it, it is meant to light your awakening and lighten your heart. Those jolts and bolts of lightning give you a glimpse of the dark so you know where to go. ....
Follow your lightening..straight to your beautiful heart!
Peace and Love,
Finding oneself forty something and suddenly and unexpectedly single after a long marriage is heart breaking beyond description. I know because it happened to me. It's like being thrown off the beloved horse you've been riding all your life. Without warning an extended part of you unceremoniously dumps you off and the extension of your every move is gone. Your "everything" is riding away from you into a sunset you will never share. Frozen in disbelief, shattered to realize the ying to your yang is no more, a desolation seeps into every nook and cranny of your being. Hallow has a new meaning as it becomes your state.
You stand numb and paralyzed in an empty field staring out after your life for a long time until a new reality rides up. The new reality is the survival stage and you climb willingly into its bouncy coach and slide atop the cold leather seat, searching for who knows what. As the Survival Coach takes you across mountains and rocky roads and barren wasteland, you just hold on, mostly because you have no place else to go. I spent several years of my life there.
It's a long ride. You get what you need along the way. Each place with its divinely orchestrated cast is an earth school experience, in a whatever gets you through the night existence. Bitter and sweet, dumb and smart, pain and comfort, anger and love, all just stops along the way.
Emotions once feared become a tonic. Hysteria tastes like champagne as laughter and tears flow uncorked and their release creates a heady oasis in your desert. With nothing left to lose and no one left to judge you, finally you are free. An erratic and puzzling kind of free but freedom nonetheless. Loneliness is a great teacher, a master of our fate teaching us to face great fear among life's rapids.
Wants and desires, aftertastes and discards, it all becomes the energy in motion that eventually shakes the desolation out of you. Irony has a universal way of cleansing your core, revealing your beautiful soul. You meet the real you out on this road and finally honor her amazing being. This journey teaches you to become your own "everything" revealing that you are "enough".
One day you wake up and the wheels of the Survival Stage squeak to a stop and when the door opens you jump out for the last time. The desert has given way to lush green fields and you are ready to see the new horizon. It doesn't hurt to look at it anymore. In fact the sun is rising, peaking through and you can see some wild horses in the distance, free and grateful... like you!
As the sun shines on your new existence you admire every inch of the skin you are no longer afraid to live in. And so, armed with the "everything" that is you, you set out to find another whose "everything" is him. After all, two "enoughs" will be more than enough.
Once open to the search for other, new lessons begin. A different journey unfolds, one you are in control of. Your choices cause comedy, drama and whimsical tragedies to abound, weaving tales of dating games and misfit toys. Separating the men from the boys is never easy. Truth be told its daunting and stupid and sometimes painful. I expect its the same for them in their search for grown ups. Maybe separating silly girls from women is just as excruciating.
"Middle age dating" is a synonym for "I ain't got time to waste". Our fear is in charge from the beginning. We mistakenly allow ego and instinct to create our list of wants and check boxes. We are worried about being old and alone from the start, so, we approach dating skeptically. Men go after what looks good and are confused when like a shiny sports car, who is all show and no go, it winds up lacking the substance they require. Women travel in packs and lament how there are "no good men"! Men are hunters. All hunters know never approach a pack, its dangerous. Rule #1, you have to separate from the herd, if you want to be fair game.
The old safety in numbers approach only works for the scripts on "the Golden Girls".
Our lists of relationship wants read like letters to Santa full of fantasy and bling.
Ladies: "I want a guy who is good looking with dark hair and financially stable with a good job and no baggage and who likes to go out nice places and is very secure in himself and has great relationships with his kids." But, are you all those things? Because why would a guy who has it all together want to be with you if you have a mountain of bills, a suitcase full of baggage, aggravating disrespectful kids and you have to ask if you look fat everyday?
Gentleman: "I want a girl who is nice looking with a great body and an amazing cook and who is super sexy in bed and isn't a gold digger or drama queen, someone independent who understands I need my time with the guys." But are you all those things? Because why would a great looking girl with a hot body want a guy with a beer belly who can't even cook her a nice dinner and causes jealous drama when she wants a night out with her girls?
How silly it is to want in another the things we can not accomplish ourselves. We must first become what we need and desire in another to attract it into our lives. Whatever it is you desire- financial security, good family relationships, interesting hobbies... we must first be. Our checklists are better written from our hearts and souls than from instinct and ego. But understanding that is a journey all onto itself. Unfortunately few of us ever realize that. And so the circutus serial dating life driven by false beliefs and quick fixes controls us.
Our time and energy are better spent working on becoming our own "everything" before seeking it elsewhere.
For instance, if you are still wallowing about what your ex did to you, have an unreasonable jealous streak, trust no one. fly off the handle with unreasonable anger, have a drinking or eating disorder, terrible relationships with siblings and children, bouts of depression. need constant attention or have childhood issues... you may want to work on those things before you try to find a relationship to make them better. Otherwise you will find yourself in the world of serial dating as relationship after relationship doesn't work out.
We don't need to be a perfect specimen, but I do believe we need to be in the "healthy " zone before the rest of our healing may be done in relationship with another.
I don't pretend to be an expert on finding Mr. Right but here are a few of my keen observations from the last few years of dating and not dating:
Not dating is a big deal and I highly recommend it for a long period of time. Date yourself for at least a year to a year and a half. No sex, no dates, just be alone. Enjoy friends strictly platonic and same sex. Do things you always wanted to do but alone. This will be the best time of your life getting to know yourself without influence. Its hard at first but nothing gets you more ready for "Mr. Right". Trust me. If you have the guts to do this on purpose its tough but so worth it. And yes, I turned down many dates during this period- honoring my commitment to myself was more important. Being truly alone I became my best friend. It was something I never took the time to do and it was too long overdue to be ignored. And this is what my best friend taught me:
Don't date anyone unless you really like yourself. You can't like anyone else if you don't like yourself! I have found that the best relationships happen when you really like the other person- I'm not talking about the sexual attraction I'm talking about sincerely "like" them! This is key for sustaining any connection. You have to like who they are. It creates a flow. This more than good sex, makes you want to spend time with them. You really get to know someone on a deeper more compatible level when you "like" them.
Don't have sex unless you like looking at yourself naked in the mirror. Sex works better when you are naked and uninhibited. If you are trying to cover up or distracted by thoughts of insecurity sex will probably suck. You have to Love your body in order to love another body. Accept yourself and know how beautiful you are. Authentic Intimacy and deep connection can't happen if you are trying to hide something.
Love your life and be joyful from within. If you are not in a positive place no relationship you have will be either. Your negativity will seep into your partnership. Fix your life before sharing it with another. Someone who dates you to clean up your mess is a janitor or handyman not a partner. Its a recipe for disaster.
Clear your life of the debris from your past. If ex's are calling, texting or taking you to dinner and flirting and it feels like a "maybe" say bye bye. These are not "friends" they are crutches and break glass in case of emergency guys. They serve no point except to feed your weak ego. Get rid of them or weaken your current position with a partner. Sweep the porch to make room for Mr. Right. Like wise with booty calls - Mr. Right is not going to find you in Mr. Wrong's bed. He won't be looking there - so grow up. These place holders take up space that you can use for productive activities. Like getting to know yourself in preparation for Mr. Right!
The exception is - If an "ex" falls into the sincere friend category, and you are both grow ups with a nice connection this can be a nice relationship in your life. But be truthful about your relationship and respect it. Healthy people attract other healthy people.
Get out and live!! You are more apt to find Mr. Right in life doing what you love. If you love hiking or boating or baseball or meditation - do it and find a mate there because it forms a foundation for you to really "like" each other. Get out and be passionate about activities. The more active you are the more interactive your life is with people. The more people you are in touch with the more possiblity to meet Mr Right!
Know thyself! Know who you are before allowing another into your life. This is where dating yourself for a long time is key. Knowing your faults and strengths honestly helps you discern the right partner on a much deeper level. When you can discern during the initial phase of getting to know someone and then later during conflict what is real and what you need to own and what is not yours to own, it makes you less mutable. Being mutable in a relationship never works. You have to be your authentic self. You can't play a role or be scared to speak up in a loving and kind way. You must represent yourself authentically and with honor. Honoring oneself means admitting fault but also not backing down in a loving and respectful way when necessary. We can't allow ourselves to take on another's baggage. Knowing what is our work to do and what is another's is the balance of a good relationship. You can't have that unless you know yourself strongly without doubt.
Be able to receive and give equally! Love is a give and take energy flow. You must be able to give love and receive love in equal measure. This goes for giving and receiving help and allowing someone to share your life- it must be equal reciprocity with a partner. Work on removing any blockages you have to balancing these energies. Be honest when evaluating the balance you share with another. An unbalanced relationship will never end well.
Open your heart! Finally the most important aspect of all to finding Mr. Right is an open heart. Love. If your heart is open and you ARE love you react differently to life. You are less reactive and more compassionate. You are able to see another's shortcomings with patience and understanding. You are more patient with yourself too. This does not mean you accept bad behavior. It means you do not allow it to disturb you peace of mind while you respond to it. Never loving to your own detriment means honoring yourself and the work you have done to be healthy by discerning what is for your highest good. Love is always the answer. Love yourself this way and the rest will come. When we are the ultimate partner to ourselves, the ultimate partner comes to us.
Don't live with one eye on the door waiting for Mr. Right. Go about your business and do the hard work of becoming the best you possible. Truly enjoy all life offers you and be in gratitude for it. Then watch what happens. The universe will respond in kind!
Peace and love,
So are you suddenly seeing 11:11 more often on the clock... or maybe you seem to be seeing the same sequential numbers on license plates, store receipts, phone numbers etc.. Why? What does it mean?
Well let's start with the 11:11 phenomenon. Most people will start to see this number or notice it more often at a time in their life when they are becoming more aware of the spiritual nature of life. Others see this sequence when the energy of something or someone is coming in to their life to get them to notice Spirit and the deeper meaning of connection and a higher source of love and existence. Either way this phenomenon is the universe trying to get you to "OPEN" to your true soul.
In fact seeing 11:11 is is very common for people who are on the verge of a breakthrough in their consciousness. Or it is being shown them because the Universe wants them to have a breakthrough to a higher consciousness. How we respond is up to us and our free will. Let me assure you this is not a coincidence- the Universe is indeed trying to get your attention. Universe as in Source of creation..Spirit..Angels..Buddha..God whatever personal belief resonates with you.
Why 1111? Well the number has a high significance and vibration. Unlike when we see a number we have assigned to a departed love one, like a birth date or other significator, 11:11 is an all higher power.
Think about it- the number 1 is the Initiator - Creation - God all knowing and divinity, the first , the beginning. What better number to call out to you... 1 = God 1= creation -1= start anew 1 = take your first breath.
So 11:11 signifies a new beginning, a life change ordained by God, the beginning of a new path.
Some think of the symbolism as 2 doors 11 11 to symbolize our decision to walk through them to our divine purpose and full potential. This is a sign that the Universe wants to co - create something with you and give you its blessing.
Often people start to see this number sequence after a trauma or challenging time as a sign Spirit is giving you support to start a new path - one with His divine presence somehow incorporated in your life. Whether that is a new career or just becoming more aware of Spirit daily is up to you and what feels right.
This phenomenon started to happen to me several years ago in such a repetitive way it was impossible to ignore. I was in a time of crisis and at first it scared me but then I realized if I just relaxed and asked myself what I felt when I saw it that - it was a wonderful and comforting energy.
When I meet people who are not particularly Spiritual and they start to spend time in my energy it's not long before they come to me and it kinda goes something like this "I keep seeing the same time on the clock everyday, what does that mean?" or 'Hey I keep seeing ones" and I always say "Oh like 11:11?" And they say "OMG How did you know that?" I laugh now because it's very predictable. Spirit wants them to open and that is why He has brought them into my energy. I am a teacher, aware of our connection to each other, I light the way. They will spread light and teach me. As we all do for each other. I contentedly wonder then what we will learn from one another and the gems yet to come!
Each year when the calendar comes around to 11:11 it is a good day to start new things or just be contemplative and go within. The number 11 is a master number that is associated with faith and Psychic Ability. 11 is also a very strong number that signifies the creation and completion of goals. So 11=creation plus 11= completion is VERY powerful! It is a day when Spirit's energy is high and it is easier to delve into your true heart and soul to see truth and gain clarity as the Universe wants you to see things. Where the planets are aligned is different each year and gives things a different aspect . This year 2017 is great for creativity and a particularly strong portal of energy is being released to help us be creative. So recommit to projects and start new things!
If you are seeing 11:11 connect with your feelings when this is shown you. What is your first thought? Is there a change you have to make? Is there something you have been wanting to do but put off? Is there a question about life that has been unanswered for a long time? Or is Spirit saying hello and giving you confirmation because you have done what the Universe expects of you? If your first thought is of a passed love one that is OK - perhaps Spirit is using that to get your attention and let you start to believe in the "other side', but usually this is not a communication from a departed loved one. They come in other ways which I will talk about in my next blog. 11:11 is a much higher and deeper calling and it is about YOU not anyone else!
Blessings for a beautiful November 11th!
Peace and Love,
The planet of luck, Jupiter spends about a year in each sign and October 10th it moves from Libra into Scorpio. This is more than likely great energy and good luck for anyone who is born in Scorpio as Jupiter spends the next 12 months bringing good tidings your way.
However, Jupiter is an expansive energy. It likes to enlarge and expand anything it comes in contact with. So, if you have any Scorpion issues that are not progressing forward this planet may now expand that energy and bring it up in a way so that it can no longer be ignored. By doing so the universe wants it resolved for your higher good. So work with Jupiter to bring out the good and take benevolent action. In short Jupiter wants you to make lemonade out of your lemons.
This energy effects everyone in some way. To find out how it effects you, look at your birth chart. You can download one for free at astro.com by knowing the time, place and date of your birth. Your chart will look like a pie cut into 12 slices these slices are your "houses". Each one of the 12 zodiac signs resides in one of your houses, find the house of Scorpio and there you have the area of your life that will be influenced by Jupiter moving through Scorpio for the next 12 months. Each house represents an area of your life. The chart below simplifies this:
Additionally each planet has traits that are its personality or energy in the way it influences us. For instance the Sun is bright - it is light, power, illumination, strength. It makes sense that it symbolizes life. Jupiter is a big happy planet that likes to expand and bring luck to things.
Each zodiac sign also has traits - Scorpio is the Scorpion, so lets look at that creatures personality. It' s silent, deadly, secretive, dangerous, powerful, brave, passionately determined and protects itself and it's young fiercely, it brings unexpected change and is not afraid of the underworld. Scorpio likes to dig deep and make us feel emotion. It is provocative. Those born in the sign of Scorpio are often secretive and passionate, they are practical, yet emotional and have an ability to look at the sadder side of life with acceptance. Birth and death are accepted with dignity and equal relevance.
I am a Scorpio moon. This energy makes me passionate and I often say I am able to find beauty in repulsive things and am able to embrace the dark side of life realistically with no judgments. Scorpios are emotional and love to be in touch and connect through deep emotion. An evolved Scorpio is a highly spiritual energy that connects birth to death and accepts sudden change readily and likes to be bold with their truth. An unevolved Scorpio can wallow in the dark murky depths of tragedy and often have hidden agendas. Either way this energy wants us to be in touch with our emotions and share them.
So what does Jupiter expanding the energy of Scorpio in your chart mean for the next 12 months?
With Jupiter in Scorpio we will feel more spiritual, more contemplative within ourselves for the meaning of our life. We will be more quiet, possibly secretive but determined and more passionate about the area influenced. We will be more apt to understand our emotion and want to share our revelations with others t connect more deeply.
This will also bring light to much scandal and things that were hidden as Jupiter expands Scorpios love of the revelation of hidden things. Don't be surprised if some seedy underworld scenarios and plots play out in the national media. Scorpio is nothing if it is not dramatic. Think Game of Thrones - which will become even more popular under this sky.
Jupiter and Scorpio align in search of truth...yours, mine and theirs and they WILL find it! Whether the experience is positive or negative is up to you. Try to embrace your emotions without judgement and do not fear vulnerability. It is in the sharing of our truth that we connect deeply as human beings and learn to love each other.
This is the year of light and dark. But if we keep our mind and actions positive we can take advantage of benevolent and happy Jupiter.
The best way to utilize and tap in to this Scorpion/ Jupiter energy is to allow the beautiful and deep connection to Spirit that is the transforming energy of Scorpio to work with Jupiter to bring truth and constructive and expansive change to your life.
Wherever this falls in your chart be truthful after some self reflection about what this energy has come to show you. Then make a clean break from that which no longer serves you and begin anew from a whole new perspective. Death and rebirth will be a theme this year.
Scorpions are about self preservation, they only sting when they sense danger. Aligned with Jupiter which wants to bring you luck and good things this energy is brought to us to clear out the poison in our lives and bring us what is healthy and lead us to our next level of consciousness.
For instance, for me this happens in my 11th house. I expect to see some changes with groups, friends and social causes I am involved with, but as the old moves on and the new comes in I will learn to accept and welcome changes for my own expansion even if bittersweet. I also intend to use the beautiful spiritual energy of Scorpio while it is expanded in Jupiter to enhance my psychic abilities and expand my spiritual career. I intend to begin gallery style reading events under this influence. So I hope you will all support me in that. I am ready to trust the universe to guide me to my highest good and peak performance. I know my hopes and wishes will come true as I brave the challenges the universe sends me. It is all meant to bring me to my divine purpose in this life. And this energy is coming to do the same for all of you.
Whatever house of your chart Scorpio and Jupiter influence this next 12 months rest assured they are there to bring you good fortune and luck in that area of life, this time is meant to bring you deeper love and more truth in that sector whether that requires a little work - only time will tell. Hold on tight and trust the universe.
Peace and love -
Angels were the first energy that I felt strongly when I began to allow myself to believe in realms other than the earth plane. At first their presence was felt in subtle ways as I still questioned if they were real. Slowly I began to believe. My Catholic upbringing helped but also made it difficult. I reasoned since Angels were in the Bible they were an acceptable source of my trust. But I feared my own knowledge. Was I crazy? Would people think me odd?
My Mother had died a couple of years before I began to experiment and study alternate new age things. She was very religious and I credit her for my faith and spiritual practices although my beliefs are now far from hers and no longer in sync entirely with what she taught me. Somehow I reasoned she would not be displeased at me for studying and praying to Angels. The woman who taught me the Rosary as a child and prayed with me throughout my life
instilled in me the devotion that is the root of all my beliefs today. But she also gave me fear and judgement. Two things that have no place in spiritual growth.
I carried stigmas and I feared blasphemy. I grew up the youngest of 5 children and there was a bit of "Catholic Rigidity". I remember my eldest sister bringing home a Ouija board from college. Us girls huddled secretly in our dark second story bedroom scared out of our wits while we tested its powers. Suddenly my Mother burst in! Hysterical with anger and fear, she threw it out the second story window while chasing us around the room screaming! I don't know which traumatized my 6 year old self more- the Ouija board or my Mom screaming about the devil, but to this day I won't allow a board anywhere near me or my home!
The Angels must have been with me that day long ago because as I hid under the bed my Mom never did catch me! :)
Another time I enlisted my Altar Boy clad, but far from cherubic, older brother to help with my First Holy Communion jitters. I was afraid I would get so nervous as the priest held the host out for my little tongue, that I would forget my response. So I got my brother to "practice" with me. There he was feeding me cheese doodles (which seemed like a good communion wafer substitute at the time) in his altar boy robe reciting "Body of Christ" as I knelt down on our shag carpet in my freshly starched communion veil and blue jeans. Of course, just then my Mother walked in. It's comical looking back now but then it was the first time I heard the word blasphemy. I could tell from the look on Mom's face she was terrified for our behavior. So nonetheless, I grew up feeling very judgmental about spiritual practices. And I am sure between that episode and the Ouija board my Mother thought she was raising a bunch of heathens!
Angels were easy for me to accept without guilt or fear. They were in the bible and pictured all over churches, so they were safe and easy for me to believe in. As soon as I began to study and read about them I could feel their loving presence and strength supporting me in my life. I also began to see signs of them everywhere letting me know I am loved and that hey are always on standby any time I need them.
Angelic energy is soft yet steady, it's airy and light. Each Angel has a different vibration and color. Raphael the healing Angel has a green aura and is often with me during times when my heart aches for something. Archangel Micheal has a blue almost purple aura and comes to give me strength. I learned how to recognize each Angel over time as their essence came into my daily life.
That was a slow process. I kept doubting. They would send me signs and still I would doubt. For instance one day I was driving on the highway wondering if Angels truly existed. I jokingly said, Ok, If Angels are real give me a sign. Suddenly next to me there was a white panel van with "ANGEL ELECTRIC" painted on the side. I have hundreds of examples like that. Often times people with me are shocked when they witness these things. But now I am used to such happening so I just chuckle inside and thank my Angels for their presence. Numbers, names, license plates, random stories, obscure incidents all too much to list have proven that I am meant to believe.
The turning point came one day when I fell down the basement stairs. I was carrying a basket of laundry and I had fuzzy socks on my feet. I slid down the cement steps and landed flat on my back. I was alone in the house, too far from anyone to hear my cries for help. I felt so much pain, I was certain my back was seriously hurt. Suddenly a voice inside me said "you are not alone, call for us". I was crying and I shouted "Angels surround me now, I need you"! A great calm came over me and I relaxed my body. I felt warm and loved. My breathing returned to normal and I slowly got up. I was OK. Stunned but, strangely Ok. Hours later the bruises started to come out. Based on the bruises on my back and legs I could not believe I was n't seriously injured. When I showed a few close friends those bruises they were shocked too, it seemed impossible no breaks or sprains. But that experience showed me I was never alone and I was always in the presence of an Army of Angels that literally have my back when called in.
I urge you to welcome and call in Angels to your life. Doreen Virtue is a famous author and many of her books including Angels 101 will introduce you to these fine light beings. I also studied Angels by choosing a particular Angel each day to work with and study. I would rotate my time with each one until I was familiar with all of them. I did this very seriously for 2 years and now my Angels are a part of my life. This is where the devotion my Mom taught me comes in. A true spiritual practice takes serious devotion and dedication.
Angels only come and help when you ask. They will not intervene unless invited. Simply call out for them when needed and feel the energy come. You must be open to believe in this energy to truly feel its power. Angels are messengers that carry our prayers directly to God. So, through their intervention miracles can happen. It is a good idea to always ask for your highest good to be done. Then, listen and watch for your signs from Angels showing you that they are near. Feathers, music, coins and numbers, random coincidences can all be angelic forms of communication.
If you have any questions about Angels just reach out and ask me. they are one of my favorite subjects and I hope you make them a part of your life!
Peace and love Georgia Rose
Yes it is true we are all psychic!
Although I am not a big fan of the word "psychic" I use it because it is a word people understand. But in truth being "psychic" simply means learning to tune in to senses we all have that are beyond the 5 senses we all use. Its like exercising muscles you forgot you had. We all know that feeling when we go to the gym and our body hurts from using something long dormant.
Well, you have psychic muscles you are not working out and exercising to the best of your ability. Trust me all humans do- we were made to connect to other realms.
It is the evolution of our human species to use frequency and energy to communicate beyond the 5 senses. Look at our expansion as a race through satellites, microwaves, blue tooth and computer communications traveling at instantaneous speeds. Our will and brain capacity has increased over time. Our ingenuity has increased and is evidently sharper in each generation that we birth and create. 10 year old kids are teaching Grandma about technology.
Just as dogs are telepathic and seem to know what each other are thinking we too can communicate without words. Does your dog sense your moods? So do humans often "know something". Its like that sense that someone is looking at you or standing behind you....how do you know? You just do!
It's all about connection. We are able to connect on a level never dreamed of 60 years ago. Our "psychic" senses are more developed than ever before.
Anyone in the Spiritual or Psychic profession will tell you young people now communicate without words. Call them indigo children or gifted - label them whatever you desire but the fact is we are becoming aware and accepting our telepathic abilities as a human race on this earth. Many more people are discovering their ability to connect with other realms and use these multi senses to speak with loved ones and guides. Reiki and many forms of energy healing are now accepted in most major hospitals as actual treatment. I recently had a radiologist ask me to tell him intuitively as a healer what I felt about his patient to help with diagnosis. Meditation is becoming commonplace especially for those under 25. Yoga classes are packed as people realize the connection to these energies takes devotion to universal principles of love and kindness and clarity of mind.
Like any other ability this gift needs work to flourish and be understood. Unwrapping your telepathic ability is a journey through self discovery and wisdom. As you take each step to realize these gifts you begin to connect to each memory of why we are given these "other" senses and you connect to other realms knowing they all have one creator.
Creator energy is love which becomes the source you use for all of your connections - on Earth with other humans and across all realms of creation. Soon you communicate with time, space, Angels, Passed loved ones, Ascended Masters and all beings by connecting your heart to the heart of Spirit - our Creator.
How do you do it? The first step is CLEARING - when you clear out your life of negative and destructive things you change your energy and a clear connection with God/ Spirit/ Creator begins...
It is not long then that you begin to feel sensations of the presence of "others". Perhaps you dream vividly of a loved one who has passed or hear a voice or you begin to receive unmistakable signs. This is your psychic connection "opening". This opening comes as you clear clutter in your life and resolve situations to come to a peaceful and much clearer space.
Without all the clutter and "noise" of earthly distractions you evolve to sense and feel more frequencies and energy than you could before when your life was blocked with clutter aka "bullshit" from these frequencies. Soon you just know things and you are tapped in to the acceptance that you now "see", "hear" and sense things on a deeper level than you ever did before. This is clarity. Colors seem brighter, you feel things deeper everything is heightened smell, sight, hearing, touch in this clear state. Suddenly, you remember those psychic muscles you forgot about as many of these "new" sensations seem familiar somehow.
Soon you may sense Angels or other realms as your meditations get deeper and more vivid. Before long you are having "experiences" and you are filled with the love of all the universe as you realize why we are here. To feel this love and to be love. And you wonder how you ever lived the other way...blocked from all these gifts and beautiful energies.
Yes, being psychic means connecting to love and healing. It is a personal journey of self discovery and finding your soul and it's meaning. No easy task but worth every step!
The best way to discover your abilities is through a course of study with someone who is a master of these things.
I will soon be doing a 4 week course on Multi Sensory Development designed to help you live beyond the 5 senses.
I hope you will join me by clicking the link on this site ..
Together we can expand this world!
Peace and love Georgia Rose
The landscape keeps changing. Like rolling green hills and thick forests the carpet under my feet shifts constantly and with it my perspective. Every once in awhile I come to a clearing and when I sit to rest, my heart whispers to me of things I need to know. The flow of this gentle breeze inside connects me top to bottom. Grounding me in strong wisdom as I quietly observe all it wants to show me about myself. Every experience and major connection is worthy of a quiet meditation in this meadow in my mind. Here is where my heart is honored by a spirit as old as dawn. The energy of eternity merges with my soul and teaches me all I need to know. Whispers from my heart, connected to God Source. Yes Spirit speaks to us in the quiet, whether or not we listen is up to us. Spirit wants us to listen.
I have learned to retreat to my meadow for sessions with God, Angels, Guides and past loved ones. My life is better that way. Before I tuned in and listened to them my life was chaotic, full of pressure and something was missing. I never heard Their whispers on my heart- I was too busy being "fabulous".
Being "fabulous" is a lot of work. It's hard to keep all those roles going and live up to all those expectations. Its so much easier living simply from one's own heart, allowing Spirit to teach you through the voice that comes from there. In those quiet whispers is all we seek, we just need to stop and listen and be our true selves.
Yes, the landscape of our life is constantly changing, with experiences meant to evolve our hearts. The evolution of my heart has taught me so much about who I am and what is important to me. Its song whispered in my ear, has taught me to detach from all that restricts me and embrace the love and joy that expands me. I no longer feel like I am choking. I feel refreshed. I feel free.
My freedom confirms all I am and with that comes such confidence and belief in myself. I need very little now. There is nothing I crave or long for. Beyond satisfaction I found a quiet strength, a subtle tapping in of a much larger reality.
As I gain a deeper understanding of a world not just created by our 5 senses but by a deeper knowing, a deeper experience and a deeper connection I realize my reality is created from multi senses and it all starts with a heart link to our Creator.
We humans think intuition and the unexplained is terribly complicated and layered in realms of energy. But it is not. It is simplicity in it's finest form. It is a connection to God and the realization that your heart when linked with His becomes your very own teacher in this life.
My heart has taught me:
1. If it doesn't fit into a saddle bag of a Harley or a back pack - I probably don't want it.
2. Always keep your sense of humor, the Angels love laughter.
3. Holding on to unpleasant emotions harms your physical body. Letting it Go is a way to honor ones self!
4. Forgiveness opens all the doors to your future ( see #3)
5. Be Lighthearted - When anything gets too serious it loses its appeal.
6. Make decisions based on how you feel in your heart not how they look to others.
7. Be brave enough to tell/face the truth especially to yourself. ( no easy task)
8. Be strong enough to face repulsively hard work - the reward is worth it. ( just tackle it all one step at a time)
9. You are never really alone - there is love in the silence, just listen...
10. Give all fear back to God or to the passed love one who gave it to you, they will transmute it to healing.
11. Be Your Own Best Friend- Amuse yourself - tell yourself jokes and find the irony in life, hold your own hand, hug yourself, look in the mirror and see your beauty- teach yourself from the heart, yes- be your own best friend.
12. Take control: Stop using food, drink, sex, drugs, material things and the attention of other humans as a source of supply. You are all you need to feel Satisfied.
13. When you realize #12 you know what freedom is!
14. Show love - its more important than the words.
15. Be love - it heals the world and you.
It's no secret...I've been a lot of places in my life. I have been many different things to many different people. And I have been many different things to me. I have often felt invisible and at other times I sadly wished I were invisible. Looking back both were equally difficult. It doesn't matter which side of the coin you are on. Life is overwhelming whether you are noticed or feel insignificant.
When I was a little girl I hid in closets during the violence, repeating over and over in my shattered little mind "I'm not really here". The mantra that was my saving grace for the first 30 years of my life, had the ability to make me numb in an instant. It carried me through just about everything. A lifetime was lived, but never really felt, as I receded to survive. Anxiety, depression, illness, abuse, never really mattered because "I wasn't really here"! A harsh early life had rendered me a mere sleepwalker on the earth insulated by thick walls of fear and shame. Nothing much could wake me, I was in deep detachment. Life has little taste when you are afraid of choking on every bite. When you are afraid to feel too much because you just can't bear it, your broken heart will never mend.
I was lucky. I got tired of living that way and allowing life to pass me by. But the catalyst for that was my ex husband Mark. When I met him he swept me off my feet and I could feel for the first time in maybe..ever.. love pour into my heart. His child like bravado and fun loving heart were startling against my very grey walls. I woke up from my deep slumber. No longer insignificant when reflected in his smile, his presence made me feel so connected and alive it made me want more. I suppose it was how the stars were aligned for us, that when he looked at me I felt bold and beautiful and confirmed. In his eyes and within the energy of "us", I was indeed here! In some ways it was like a Disney fairy tale where the Princess gets kissed back to life.
Healing my wounds was the key to feeling again and living from my heart. While I credit Mark with opening my door to love, in the end he was far from my healing Prince or happy ending. All fairy tales end when the clarity of their fantasy breaks through mirror and we see our illusions turn to the reality of never was. Inevitably, many of the wounds I were contracted in the lifetime to heal were ones inflicted by him. And of course inflicted by myself, for choosing the wrong medicine to heal me. Perhaps vulnerability was the very reason I fell for him in the first place. They say you shouldn't startle a sleepwalker awake... I was disoriented and vulnerable, and completely unprepared for the headiness that was us, after all those years of being numb and locking my heart with insignificance.
I learned healing is something you do on your own. There are no crutches worthy of holding up your soul, no matter how beautiful and attractive they seem. It is only you and a higher power that can complete you and make you see the masterpiece you are.. When you realize that - you become invincible!
A big part of my healing was releasing the fear of loss I associated with loving and being vulnerable. That came when I realized I had never been alone. Not really. Not as a child in the closet nor any of the other repulsive and desperate places I have found myself from time to time.
My longing for invisibility was really an invincible little girl taking care of the future Georgia. I was born a survivor. I was taking care of me from the start and I would always take care of me, with a little help from above. I had myself and I was not alone. While I was busy trying to be invisible I was in fact protecting my invincible self, that beautiful soul in the core of me. I just hadn't met her yet.
When I started to strip away my layers, I found my heart and soul beautifully preserved in a cocoon of my own making. My heart had been waiting for me to discover it when the time was right. After enough tragedy - the time was right. When you have nothing left to lose you stop being afraid. Stripped bare you have to look at the only thing left- yourself.
I have been many places and I have been many things. There are people who love me and there are those who would run me over with their car if they saw me crossing the street! It all depends on when they met me, what phase of my work/life I was in. Life is work, its gritty and nasty and sad and happy and beautiful. We can be ugly or good. We can be cold or embracing. I've been everything.
Mine, like all of us, was the process of survival. As many of us know- you can't love when you are just trying to survive , you have to drop the gun, the rope, the sword. Survival life is a soap opera, a TV sitcom life acted out against a backdrop of abuse, humor and bat shit crazy tragedy that becomes OUR STORY. As we act out our wounds in every situation and relationship without understanding ourselves and healing the root cause of our reactions, we spin in a web of repetition, that wounds us further. It is only in the awareness of the patterns, we start to see how we can change our fractals. It's a lot of work to pull out a domino from the row to stop the fall. But with enough bravery and help from the universe it can be done. Exercising that valor and faith is what reveals our beauty and magnificence!
We can hide from our story and crave invisibility or we can embrace it all and give our invincible self the chance to change our story. Yes, you are invincible, I promise! That soul you carry has been with you and will be with you eternally. Every challenge is a new chance to prove that we are truly invincible and that we deserve to embrace all life has to offer. When we open to that, we realize we are not alone. We feel the higher power within us, supporting us. I have many profound mantras now. I no longer chant "I'm not really here" to make an unbearable situation, bearable.
Now I call out to God and Angels and I often feel their presence inspiring me, rooting for me and giving me the strength I need to heal wounds, be courageous, face truth and live my best life. When I give myself the chance to triumph and I don't go numb I am no longer afraid and vulnerable . I am powerful and connected to something far greater than myself and that makes me feel invincible. Tuned in to a higher power - I am invincible. Suddenly the world grows calm and less scary and I triumph over the hardest times.
After a particularly scary moment, I often look back and wonder sometimes how I found the courage to do what I've just did... I am reminded that the Angels and God our creator will never fail me and most of all I will never fail myself. Trust in the Universe is Huge but trusting myself is even bigger!
We all have times like that - where we can't believe we survived or made it through a particularly hard time but we know someone was watching over us.
The most powerful part of that for me is knowing our soul is invincible! We are never alone..
I never wish I was invisible anymore. Overcoming obstacles and getting to be a part of everyday miracles is so cool...I don't want to miss a thing!
Peace and love- Georgia Rose
The energy is building! On Monday August 21, 2017 it is the great United States Solar eclipse thus named because it is the first solar eclipse to pass over the entire United States in 100 years. But what truly makes this a much more rare event is other aspects besides the alignment of the earth, moon and sun. Saturn, Uranus, Pluto, a Mercury Retrograde and the fixed star Regulus play important roles in this energy. Without going into too much detail let's focus on Mercury and then Regulus because that is where this energy gets interesting in a "once in a lifetime" way.
Eclipses either lunar (moon) or solar ( sun) enfold an energy of beginnings and ending but in a much more intense way new and full moon cycles. The energy of eclipses builds for 3 to 6 months before and after the event and the cumulative energy usually creates a life change or unexpected out come. In what way depends on the other planets whose energy is involved.
Mercury is our mind our intellectual reasoning...when it goes retrograde it is slowing down its rotation to an almost standstill and reverse. When this happens we revisit the past. The universe gives us this energy to make us contemplative and introspective so we learn where we made mistakes, where we triumphed and what changes and actions we need to make to move forward on the right path. But it dredges up the past in order for us to do this. Sometimes this can be annoying or painful, but keep in mind it is for our own good!
Regulus is a fixed star- it is exactly on the eclipse center at 29 degrees Leo. Leo is the lion , our heart energy and the sun our strength. (anyone with planets in Leo is greatly effected by this solar eclipse on august 21 of this year.) Regulus is the brightest star in the constellation of Leo. It is the Lion's Heart it is the "regulator" the one who makes things right and puts it in order... Some say he is the energy of letting go of revenge.
So, is this all starting to make sense? We have a total solar eclipse where the sun, moon and earth are exact in 29 degrees Leo with Regulus exactly in the same spot and a Mercury Retrograde..among other aspects that are all strengthening this energy!
So the universe wants us to look back, put our lives in order, let go of the past and make things new. We are being asked to Step into our destiny and start our new chapters.
As the eclipse symbolizes light to dark - the moon will block our sun in the middle of the day, and then as it passes away from the sun light will shine through. As the great central sun, strongest in the sign of Leo the lion, once again shines upon us. we are Illuminated and blessed from the universe in divine form. Light to dark and light again. As Regulus shines as the brightest star in the evening sky our heart of the lion sits in triumph above us.
So my prediction is that many of us will have amazing an unexpected changes occur. This is the culmination of whatever started to come to a head in the end of July or around August 7th for you. This is also reminiscent of wherever you were in your life around 1998 or so. It is a repeat of some of those energies - giving us in effect a "do over" to make things right.
Use this energy wisely, it truly is a once in a lifetime opportunity to progress your life forward. If you feel frustrated it is only because the eclipse and Leo energy (which is fire) are pulling us forward while Mercury wants us to look back. Look back only for wisdom and clarity, do not wallow in the past. This energy will bring us great clarity to form new perceptions and identities DO NOT fight that.
This is the energy that changes the world- its perceptions and needs. It will bring us individually into great spiritual awakenings and gifts of multi sensory perceptions to have wisdom we have never had before as human beings. This next decade will be futuristic and forward thinking through telepathy and science in ways you can not imagine.
For each of us personally this eclipse will bring a need to change the path of our lives to a more heart felt and compassionate way of living. In short we will all let go of the bull shit and learn what is important for true happiness and contentment in our lives. Forgiveness is an important part of this lesson - so let go of it all!
If there is anything you have been holding on to from the past or any negative emotions weighing you down get rid of it now. Write them down and burn them , swim in the ocean to cleanse - make a pact with yourself to start anew.
The universe is baptizing us in light , baptize yourself with your truth and birth a new you. Step into the things your heart has always wanted to do. The universe is in full support of you now. As the moon passes in front of our sun - Come through the tunnel to the light.
Sweep away all that no longer matters and step into what does matter - love.
Peace and love,
Just a couple of years ago there was a time when Saturday evenings were determined by a group of hard partying friends. We planned the nights festivities via social media by what band was at what bar or who was having a birthday. It was an amazing and heady time of rebellion and second childhood, when I sorely needed a distraction from tremendous loss and trauma in my life. I was broken and when I was "out" I didn't feel broken. Those friends from my "lost era" will always have a special place in my heart because they truly filled my void for a time and I am grateful.
The excitement of live music and being caught in the vibe of a crowded club dancing was medicine for my lost soul who at home had never heard silence so loud. The attention of the "in" crowd, my posse soothed my bruised ego while the sense of belonging healed the fact that I was unwanted by the one I had given my all, my everything to.
To be told you are beautiful and funny, even by strangers when you have been rejected by your own husband is quite brilliant for someone like me. Or someone like I was. I needed to belong. it made me feel better. To be invited and wanted was everything to me after I had been so abruptly and cruely uninvited from my whole life. The excitement and high of it became my life line. As selfies and huge group photos of parties and "going out" became the chronicle of my new "look at me" "I'm doing great" "who needs you" awesome and fabulous life, I forgot to "be me".
That's what happens when you get caught up in the external to avoid dealing with the internal. Before long my crutch became an addiction. A middle age peer pressure self inflicted by my fear to mis- step and be tossed "out of the group". I had to keep up or miss out on all the fun and believe me I was having epic fun!! Since the alternative was sitting home and feeling awful loneliness and deep pain I did NOT want to be out of this posse!
And so it wasn't long before Saturday evenings turned into, Friday and Saturday night and Sunday afternoon and Weds night and ..... yeah, this crowd could "turn it up" as they say. And I was more than happy to participate in the awesome circular pattern of a party life better than I had ever dreamed of . These were fun people, great times and I loved them...once upon a time.
But the thing about patterns that rotate around one common thread is they never move forward and the thread always gets tired and eventually weakens and breaks. We humans have many emotions meant to progress us forward, when we try to stay in only one mind set it never lasts. Whether it is negative like depression or positive in a weee...party fun way, eventually it changes. Vibrations always change, we can't harness one frequency for very long, sooner or later we must let it go. We honor vibrations best when we send them out into the universe to live in space and time as history or future. Life is only what is now and we do better when we face that and stay fully present in our always evolving reality. As our soul evolves so does our vibe.
We humans have more than one thread, these many threads of emotion are made to progress us forward and give us experiences to teach us. We are meant to feel the energy of our emotions = in motion. This expands our wisdom and compassion and ability to love.
My stint as a "party animal" came to a grinding halt one Labor Day weekend. After 3 days of non stop fun I was dancing on the deck of a packed bar on Fire Island. It was Monday Labor Day at 5 pm and I didn't want this amazing summer to end...ever! I could see the ocean under a brilliant blue sky as I danced with my friends in damp bathing suits and beach cover ups. We were all tanned and golden and laughing in the wind. In the distance I heard the ferry blow his horn over the jam of a particular fun dance tune. I turned to see the ferry pull up in the distance. The band was rockin' the deck and all was well and suddenly something came over me. I grabbed my beach bag from behind a huge speaker and hugged everyone goodbye. "Where are you going" , they all asked, "I gotta go" , I said and started to run for the ferry flip flops in hand!
I don't know what came over me..maybe I had enough medicine and I knew it was time. Maybe I was just tired or maybe I was finally strong enough to face the real music, not the noise from the bands speakers but the tune of my real life. The one with the sad scary rythym, I had avoided for 2 years. The one my life really was, not the lyrics I created for face book photos.
On the ferry the tears started to come...but it was ok I knew the truth. The beautiful blue eyes behind the big sunglasses needed to look inside not outside to find the party. I knew this was going to hurt like hell. But I knew there was no other way. It had to be done. The thing I was searching for wasn't on the dance floor I knew I would find it in my heart. Everything on the ferry seemed surreal and far away. I was a balloon losing its air I had finally started to come down from it all. The descent was finally unavoidable.
I drove home feeling more deflated but determined to sit with the heaviness. I made scrambled eggs for dinner and sat on my couch literally for the first time in 2 years. I couldn't stand to be in that room of memories before now. But there I sat and faced the silence. I was never ore afraid in my life. I never heard silence so loud that it pierced my very fiber. But I sat and made myself listen. It would be the beginning of a long silence in my life. Party people don't like you when you don't attend their parties. They never step into your silence. It is just the way of those things. They have different purposes. I chose them to have fun and I chose to self correct to do my work . There was no way to sync those vibes.. so this work would be done alone for now.
I am a woman of many colors and many frequencies. I will always look for the next color, the next vibration, so I can fully revel and connect with all life offers. This appetite for life is what gave me the ability to self correct. It gives me the ability to enjoy an amazing guitar riff and feel its bliss with my entire soul and to know the depths of great loss and feel its sorrow deep in my marrow. Whatever the song it fills space in my hollow bones and makes me know who I am. There is a strange freedom and stability in knowing I can experience it all and feel alive. But that doesn't mean its not scary sometimes. Intensity is powerful but necessary.
That is what gave me the power to self correct. Somehow I knew that no matter how much I partied the silence and pain hung just outside the fringe and it was in control as long as I avoided it. I had to deal with it sooner or later. Even if that meant a hard time where I basically alone and had no friends.
Those times were very difficult. But I reinvented myself and learned to make different choices. It was a long road but I have created beautiful and meaningful connections now by living in truth to who I am. I look at where I choose to seek pleasure and if it is good for me.
Times have changed...and as my vibe changed so did my friends.
When I finally faced my life the universe brought people in that helped me and loved me and I was able to do the same for them. I learned friendship is meant to be balanced and equal. When we only allow people into certain parts of our life that is all we have...those parts. But when we share all things equally without fear of judgement it is more loving.
Last night was a beautiful evening in my home as I held a Reiki share and Pot Luck dinner. Tears came to my eyes as I looked around the room once so haunted with loss I was once afraid to sit in it. It was Saturday night and I and my home were so filled with love it was bursting with it!
I thought there would be about 10 of us sharing Reiki and a beautiful meal after. But as the day progressed friends called to say they wanted to bring friends. We ended up with quite a crowd of people and 5 Reiki practitioners for what can only be described as a "love in". Lost in space doing Reiki I felt the universal love of the world around us. Time after time in the distance,I heard the front door opening and more coming. As I looked around the room and saw my friends gathered in love and fellowship I marveled at how far I have come! I am connected with such beautiful souls who share my music and my silence. I marveled at how true it is that our vibration attracts or repels love.
I am grateful so very grateful for all this love and knowing I created and reinvented my life to be so rewarding is a miracle to me. My once shattered heart has healed through these connections.
I made myself feel wanted, invited and loved! And it is reflected back at me.
Knowing the best is yet to come is such an amazing feeling when your heart is already full!
Peace and love,
It has changed for me - this ability to connect to other energy, other space and to step into time other than where I am standing. In the beginning it was fleeting and something just outside my whim, unpredictable and unreliable. It was like feeling air move or the flash of an invisible field suddenly shadowed then gone. You just know when it changes although you can't see it or touch it or hear it with the senses you use most. In your quest to see if it is real you learn to feel it with the senses you have hardly ever used before.
Slowly and suddenly it all unfolds, this place where opposites are parallel until they move into balance and doubt becomes knowing and finally it evolves into truth. You discover another dimension of yourself which discovers another dimension of the universe.
Using these newly awakened senses, things happen that are impossible within the parameters of what our 5 senses know to be logical. But I have learned that rigid limits always distort things. We try to explain things away as coincidence or parlor trick because they make us uncomfortable, and we miss the whole point of them. But, after the hundredth time you start to accept... this is really happening, Yes wow! This is really happening. I know things I could not know, I have things happening that are impossible but they are real.
A lifetime of doubt is replaced by awe and a lifetime of limited beliefs pours open as though the Hoover dam was just breached. There is a beautiful freedom in feeling expanded and without the limits of what we are taught. It's like flying over a rainbow colored waterfall, wet and vibrant and breathless... You are high on the fact that such a thing exists and it is real.
Habitual words like "never" and "always" and phrases like "I don't believe in that" are replaced with "maybe", "it's possible" and "I don't believe that, ... yet" . As we grow to understand so much more than what currently is and our thoughts begin to encompass what is beyond our reach it seems the mere acceptance that the impossible could be possible brings it forward and within our reach. Something substantial occurs then, we have an experience, and another and another... and before long we are believers, truth is changed, the world has expanded, your life is awakened. You have crossed over the boundaries others set for you.
And with that a deeper understanding of love and soul lights our heart and expands us from within. As our beliefs become unlimited and open so does our heart . Love is no longer limited to an earthly pursuit but is unlimited and transcends the realms.
I tell my clients if someone loved you deeply on this earth and their soul is now in a higher place of divinity imagine what their love for you is now from that place? What would be it's purpose unless we are meant to feel it across the realms. There is no death only transition - crossover. Love is limitless.
The vibration of love is out in the universe where we have created it. It is there suspended in a time that is linear waiting for us to pull it in when we need it and let it wash over us and fill our soul. It nourishes us so we can share it with others, a universal cycle of pure unconditional unity.
The ability I once doubted and pushed away because it was "impossible" evolved into a beautiful gift that has given countless people and myself healing and joy. Can you imagine if I had continued to deny its existence. A beautiful bell, a calling, a song so amazing that it CAN NOT be unheard. It rings forth with the force of the universe, a mere soul like me can not stop it. Nor can it be taught or learned from another. No this journey is one of self discovery first. All that is required is clearing ones life of all negative distractions and opening to a pure connection with creation. A simple formula that is the hardest and most complicated work any human can do. Work that continues until we no longer do. Certainly no easy task.
My ability is changing once again and with its evolution comes another difficult task at hand. I used to be able to open and close as it was appropriate depending on my setting. I have a very earthly career besides my spiritual one. Boardrooms are no place for psychic readings and spirit guides so I censor myself.
But lately the energy is always there, more forward than ever before radiating love. It is palpable and it enables me to feel energy and a persons soul and their troubles and joys. I sense what is around them, who has passed, who they love. Not in an intrusive way but in a beautiful way. It is very heart based and opens me more to the love of the universe. It is as though the light in the world is brighter and illuminating more things for me to see.
For instance I recently met a couple while showing a house and I started to spontaneously read them and talk about passed loved ones before I realized it. They were receptive but OMG, not good I thought!
I worked very hard to keep my spiritual life almost secret from my other business. Thinking my Spiritual life would somehow harm or discredit my earthly career. But lately there is a crossover between my worlds. It is unsettling yet I know why it is happening. The Universe is showing me I need to integrate who I am and live an authentic life. It is forming my identity by giving me the opportunity to accept all of me.
I suppose this new transition will not be easy. But it is yet another gift. As Saturn in Sagittarius transits through my first house it is pushing me to integrate my personality with my soul. How amazing is this that the universe has decided to show me such love as to have an opportunity through others- to live my truth and reconcile negative energy. After all isn't it negative to keep part of your life secret from another part? Isn't that acting on doubt and fear. Do the very things I overcame to open my heart still linger on the fringe of my life threatening to close it? And so the universe is making sure that does not happen by heightening my gift to be undeniable by sharpening my voice to be heard.
So this journey of self discovery continues. This discovery of a new reality and my authentic identity is actually based on opening my heart to accept all of myself not just parts put in different boxes. I need to put all of me in one big box with unlimited sides. I am supposed to crossover my boundaries to merge all of me into one life.
It truly is amazing that the universe shows us the way to our most productive and satisfying life if we can just listen, observe and pay attention. Today try to listen to the signs around you because they are leading to your best life, however difficult the journey may seem you have to do your own work to get there, because you are uniquely you and no one can teach you how to be that.
Peace and Love - Georgia Rose
It seems we humans worry an awful lot about making the right decisions when it comes to relationships and matters of the heart. Often sitting in conflict until a decision is made for us. That place doesn't always feel so good as we lick our wounds and go deep to work through the sadness and disappointment that weighs so heavy. Letting go is hard - being let go even harder. Especially when love lingers and connections still bind. We doubt, we wonder, we regret. There is a sappy romantic sort of saying "if you love something set it free - if it comes back."..blah blah - you know the one - I always hated it! I think its idiotic.
Why? Because although I trust the Universe to bring me what is best, I'm not one to leave things to chance, I am a creator not a by stander. I guess you could say me and the universe are co creating.
My life has shown me that once love is created it never dies. We choose its vibration by the way our ego or heart decides to honor or deny it.
I realize when I look back on the times of my life - the painful break ups and joyful connections that somehow the universe has proved to be my perfect partner in my journey and the teachings of love. You see, ultimately everything has been as it should be - timed as it was. Although as it occurred I may have felt otherwise.
I needed to be with certain partners at certain times to know that particular experience of love or joy or pain or sorrow. And I needed to feel their absence at certain times to have the experiences I was supposed to. Inevitably it all brought me here to the place where I am whole and strong and able to love freely. To be love. This is the current destination. The road and its stopovers could not have been any other way. The right thing was always done by me or the other at the right time. It all comes down to timing.
Ultimately when you are who you are meant to be, in the right place, the right thing comes at the right time and it feels good. It doesn't matter if its someone you already tried with before because timing can sometimes make round 2 different - you are different and so are they -partly because what went before made you so.. yes it is quite true that In the end timing is linear and love is limitless.
Once created Love simply exists. It hangs somewhere within reach until we pay attention to it. Love, the universe and I are partners now, we share the driving and decide where we want to go. I am no longer just along for the ride eyes closed, holding on for dear life. No I am here fully present.
And just then the past walks in. He looks good and your heart butterflies...
And then, you remember... that familiar face, the feel of that one, the smell of them and their smile... and that little stirring within that makes you catch your breath...
You feel alive and joyful in their presence, part of you doesn't want the night to end and you want to feel their kiss, but you have a hard time admitting that to yourself and so you hang back a bit. Wondering how love has survived, you doubt love even when the universe has its heartbeat pulsing in your veins. ... choice. conflict. ego. heart. It's all swirling..
So, instead of what you want to do,you hug him and say goodbye. You walk away wishing he would call your name, even just whisper it, so you could turn around and run to him. o, instead of what you want to do, you drive away wishing for the courage to turn the car around. Even as your fingers grip the wheel they itch to grab that small waist you left standing in the parking lot and kiss her like you wanted.
The universe is showing you that love is a survivor. And sometimes when all is said and done its right there where we left it, waiting for our time and heart to give us and it a second chance.
Because some things are just meant to be, at a certain time, in a certain place for certain people.. .happiness is a choice. Sometimes the Universe drives and Reverse is the right gear even though it's up and to the left.. and often a bitch to find ... it's there if you have the courage to reach for it.
Peace and love
Mine has not been an easy life. It certainly has not been as hard as others, but easy is not a word I am familiar with in any category of my existence. I have faced some brutal times and tough decisions. But the hardest decision by far has been to remain open and feeling in a world that has beaten me down. To decide to allow the world back in after it has chewed you up and spit you out like bad meat is the most courageous thing a human can do. And yet we all have the capacity for such resiliency and its rewards. The key is to allow ourselves to be open to it and that is no easy task!
Like most lessons I learned this the hard way. My wisdom is mostly built on pain. I seem to have a penchant for experiencing the opposing emotion or aspect to a solution before I find it. Such was the case with lesson of "the open heart".
I had to close off, feel nothing, zip it up and go numb before I could fully understand the need, the gift and the beauty of being wide open. Much of this is documented here in this blog.
This revelation did not come in a rush or all at once. It did not even come in a one time unlocking that burst open a door that stayed open. The door of one's heart is not forgiving! It is more of a slow prying open of a door that has very rusty hinges. It creaks and resists what it does not remember. It hesitates to be of service. It keeps creeping shut as it only knows one way to operate. You have to repurpose the door, oil the hinges, make sure its balanced. As you do the necessary repairs it keeps swinging closed on you. Until it finally starts to stay open longer and wider. Then after a while, the day comes- it wants to stay wide open and it doesn't remember being closed. Hallelujah!
That process took 6 almost 7 grueling years of my life. And I am grateful for my relatively short learning curve, because it takes some humans a lifetime to open their heart. And sadly, some humans never open. I am one of the lucky ones. But as they say luck comes with hard work. And I've yet to find a formidable enough door stop to keep that old heart door from swinging closed at times.
I still work every day to keep my heart open. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes it starts to zip up! There are many days I have to remind myself to stay open so love can find me and I can give the world what it needs from me. Especially after a rejection or loss.
We all have traumas. Losses, abandons, cruelty, abuse,unfair events, sickness, rejection, stress and dramas that make us shut down. I have days I stay in bed. I have days I stay in the house and don't talk to people. This human world is painful. As a collective we are not always loving to each other and it makes us want to retreat. We get fearful and wounded. That is part of our human experience.
But the answer, the solution, the "feel better" is always love. You have to open your heart for that.
Sometimes it is not black or white, its not dark or light. Sometimes the "zip up" comes in grey. During those times, it's as if everything is shadow. This is my worst enemy. A trick from our crafty little ego. The "grey" is apathy, it's nothing, its no pleasure or pain. Its' "meh" , its numb, its daily routine, it's sleep walking in the shadows. This is the hardest closure to open. And yet sometimes my greatest teacher is this grey! But I hate it the most!
At least when your in pain or sadness you fight for relief from the black you reach to light the dark. You instinctively swim for the surface. Its harder to tell light from dark, white from black when you are in the grey. Its hard to find your way to the opening when everything looks the same. Blah and Nothing.
There is a clinical term for this feeling of lack of pleasure. This boredom and apathy with what used to please you. It often happens to PTSD post traumatic stress sufferers. Its called anhedonia. Doctors give meds for it. They tell you your depressed.
I am not a doctor. But I know my heart. I know my ego. I know the battle of self mastery. I know what this is.
I call it your ego screwing with you because it wants to control your big old heart. I call it fear based mentality using everything it's got to self defend. I call it the warriors struggle with heart over ego. I know making me passive and apathetic is my fears last ditch effort to zip me up lest I get pulverized by the world again. I know I will beat this. I know my heart will win.
Even as my mind is exhausted from fighting and my body feels weak from the struggle in my mind I know I will win. Why?
Because I have felt my heart burst with love standing in the sand at the oceans edge as dawn came over the horizon. Because I have marveled at the softness of my dogs fur brushing against my bare leg. Because I have felt home in the arms of another's embrace. Because I have felt my heart fill with pride at a job well done. Because I have felt joy when in full connection with Spirit. Because I love these things.
I remember these things and I will not forget them. I remember a thousand memories to bring me back to my big open heart so I will not "zip up" or slam the door shut again.
We all have our memories created to melt the barriers around our hearts. They hold the energy of love. The keep us open even in difficult times - if we allow them. Little is required of us in life except for the task of keeping our hearts open. Do that and the rest comes...
Every once in awhile we start to live in fear again. Its easy to fall back when someone or something in the world threatens us. We start to lick our wounds and we are tempted to pick up the old patterns we find there. But staying there gets us nothing and no love in the end.
After a particular struggle to keep my heart open I went to sleep asking for guidance. The next morning I woke up and pulled a notebook off my shelf thinking to journal for a bit in the early morning hours. I randomly opened it and found a passage I had written some time ago....here is what I found:
DECEMBER 3, 2015
"The interpretive process of who I am as a spiritual and human being is unfolding with little effort on my part. My only job is to stay open and pay attention. I will continue to source my life from the divine channel I am and give divine service to the world. In this I give and receive love to myself and others. I remain open always. "
I immediately felt joy and love in my heart. The wall came down. I was once again"un zipped". I sat curled up in the chair clutching the notebook against my heart, with renewed faith in myself and my battle for mastery over my life. How can anyone close their heart to such a miraculous world as ours? I thought "I want more" as I felt my enthusiasm bubble up for what the day would bring.
Thank You my Universe-
Stay Unzipped - Open to Love -
Peace and Love,
The journey of self discovery and awareness is a long hard road but its also beautiful and comical too. Meeting oneself and standing alone in all sorts of situations and circumstances certainly puts you in places you never dreamed of. Some of them great and some well...not so terrific, but commitment to observing it all, brings a very satisfying reward. This reward gives us confidence and stability and propels us forward, deeper and deeper on the journey of this thing called LIFE. The reward is wisdom from our Creator, and love for the process of this life. The process of our own unique path will twist and turn with irony and synchronicity, for what reason?
To teach us to love all things. Yes it's true- in the end each lesson comes down to that one thing: Love. Love is the only thing that is real in this vast universe. I hope these lessons I learned can help you out on your way...
Here are 15 things super important things I've learned so far about Loving Yourself or Others.
1. BE YOUR TRUE SELF: When we are frustrated with any situation or life in general, it's because we are not being authentic. When we act real and speak our truth, suddenly, no matter what the outcome is, we become peaceful and more accepting.
2. KEEP A HEALTHY "V": Geese fly in a "V" for stamina and strength, the lead goose is actually constantly rotated on long journeys, as each bird takes their turn supporting the "V" team and sharing the agenda of the flock. We all need a "V" team to fly higher! When someone says "I have no agenda" they are usually lying. People with no agenda don't feel the need to say so. ALWAYS surround yourself with a good "V" - that's people who support and align with your agenda and propel you forward. If the people around you do not sincerely support your best interests - reevaluate your "V"!
3. LOVE SHOULD BE BEAUTIFUL AND AUTHENTIC: Never do anything in a relationship that is going to make you resentful. Resentment is the poison that corrodes everything. It is love gone wrong... from truth to bullshit. Once we start to sacrifice ourselves to please another love ceases to expand us. We start to wear a mask and play games. Then, love diminishes and sometimes it even gets downright ugly! Love should be beautiful and it is- as long as it's truthful and authentic! Stay real and true to yourself.
4. MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY FIRST: People are attracted to happy people. People respect people who respect themselves. When we put pleasing others ahead of our own happiness - they treat us shabby and we start to feel taken advantage of. When we break rules 1,2, and 3 our lives becomes an exhausting mess and no one is happy.
5. CONNECT WITH NATURE: Get outdoors regularly to feel gratitude for the earth and sky, trees and ocean. This grounds us in beauty and lifts our vibration because we connect with creation. This divine elixir is supreme energy for our souls!
6. SIT WITH YOUR EMOTIONS BEFORE ACTING: When we want to "tell someone off" or be impulsive, its just because we want to throw our negative feelings on another to get rid of our own crappy feelings and make ourselves feel better. Instead, when we sit with our emotions and get to the heart of them, we learn whats going on much faster and things become clear. When I come down from my head and into my heart I am brave enough to feel my pain and deal with it. Soon compassion is flooding the soul instead of anger. Much healthier and far wiser.
7. DON'T EVER SETTLE: When we accept something that makes us feel less than our desired emotion or response, we chip away at our self worth. We deserve the best. We deserve the things that energize us and fill us with passion. We are here to feel this world to it's full capacity. God wants us to be blissful and radiant and filled with his Spirit. He wants us to live "full throttle' so don't let your passion or Him down!
8. HONOR YOUR BODY: We are created to love and be loved. We all desire this to the highest degree. Our physical body is our receiver and transmitter of love. When we take in things that alter it, drugs, alcohol, tobacco, excess of any kind we alter our ability to receive and transmit love because we are not at peak performance. Loving our bodies and keeping fit expands our ability to experience love fully. An unhealthy body image holds us back from loving and being loved. Do whatever it takes to stay healthy. We deserve the love that comes from honoring ourselves.
9. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ABSORB: Like #8 we need to honor our heart, mind and soul too. When we are aware of what media we absorb, we start to change it and us for the better. Music, Media, TV, Movies, Broadcast News, Books, Magazines and People all have a message that creates a certain energy that effects us. If we are trying to resolve family issues and watching reality TV where everyone is bickering or if we are trying to get over a loss and play sad songs constantly it is counter productive to our hearts agenda. This is self sabotage. Censor what you take in so it promotes the goal for your life agenda. When we censor the media around us to influence us in a positive way we really start to change! Staying positive and affirming in the messages we give ourselves is a key to happiness.
10. SEX is the MOST SACRED ENERGY EXCHANGE - See # 8 & 9 - be careful what you take in. When we make love with someone we are exchanging our most precious energy with them, allowing them to absorb our essence and taking in theirs in the most vulnerable way humans can experience. We are actually exchanging our DNA. Everything is energy in this universe and energy is negative or positive as our response to it is as well. For all of us, but especially empaths it's important to be discerning about who we have sex with. During sex we don't just exchange physical energy but we are exchanging the vibration of our soul and mind as well. Choose wisely!
11. OUR BODY NEVER LIES: Tune in to your body! Emotions are E-nergy in Motion. By observing the effect our emotions have on our body we have a huge source of information that tells us the truth about everything! Our bodies are a gauge of happiness, sadness, anxiety, caution, comfort - when we tune into our physical feelings and observe the subtleties of our body and ask where the sensations are coming from our "gut" will tell us all we need to know about every person, place, situation and circumstance. And it NEVER lies to us. That is called intuition...NEVER ignore it. It is our divine gift from our creator.
12. ANXIETY IS NOT REAL: Nothing is real but this exact moment in time. What happened a minute ago is gone and what is yet to happen is not real - it hasn't happened. So the only thing that is real is NOW, this moment. We only have anxiety when we are thinking of the past or the future. We never have anxiety when we are in the moment. So..stay in the moment and its impossible to have anxiety.
13. LISTEN TO WISE ONES: If someone has been where you are or has been where you are going...listen to them. They may save you a lot of heart ache and grief. They may tell you the best thing to do! We waste much time when we are young thinking we know everything. We DON'T!
14. ASSUME POSITIVE INTENT: This is a big one! We get cynical and suspicious and miss opportunities because we are afraid to trust. But when we open our hearts we often find people for the most part are genuine and kind and want to see us succeed. By assuming positive intent we open more doors.
15. MASTER BEING ALONE: When we can stand alone unafraid and truly feel OK. we have given ourselves the most valuable gift in life. It changes every relationship we have and allows us to experience love in a deeper, richer and more real way. We no longer grasp for attention, seek approval or fear being alone. Our relationships are not fear based, but are based in love and desire. Desire is the only thing that keeps love alive. Can you imagine how beautiful and fulfilling each connection would be if you had no fear of it? If you could love with no fear of rejection or of being alone, how amazing would that be? You would enjoy every connection knowing whatever the outcome, you would eventually be fine. And you would be able to devote 100% to loving without your energy divided by fear. Master being alone and you will truly love another without attachment to any outcome! That is FREEDOM.
Just some food for thought as...My journey continues.....
Peace and Love,
There was a time when I was in love with Pizza. I considered myself a Pizza connoisseur. In my quest to find the epitome of this thinly crusted, saucy, cheesy combination of culinary perfection I rejected a lot of very fine Pizza. Pizza is not so easy to get right. What seems like a simple food has a lot of complicated ingredients. Just the sauce alone takes much consideration when rating the overall experience. If the sauce is too spicy or too sweet …game over. And the crust being the foundation of the whole thing can ruin even an otherwise appealing and attractive experience. Of course, my palate wasn’t the only judge, a perfect slice had to look good too. My search took me far and wide.
I had an idea in my mind and tummy, of what the perfect pizza would look like and taste like- hell even smell like when I found it. A slender thin crispy crust, with a perfect sauce and bubbly cheese just browned to perfection and a sprinkling of sesame seeds on the round top portion of the ends. Hmmm my mouth waters now just thinking of it.
I was connected to my soul mate pizza even before we met. It would be a match made in proverbial pizza heaven. I looked in many fine restaurants and lots of divey pizza parlors for my ideal. I came close a couple times. But I am not sure I ever found the perfect slice of pizza. As I said I rejected a lot of very good pizza’s. Oh, sure I tried to accept them for a while but in the end, they were judged for their too fat or too thin crust, a rubbery or brittle soul. Their sauce would inevitably prove to be too spicy or weak and some left a bitter aftertaste. Cheese was a big thing too- sometimes it was too clingy to the dough, sometimes it slid off too fast and had no commitment to the foundation of the slice. For a while I resorted to making pizza at home just to “do it my way” thinking the quest would have better results with me in charge of the creation.
You know where I'm going with this right?....
Years later I realized my Pizza Hunt was a metaphor for finding the perfect connection. It was just another way my ego acted out its childish indulgences and “wants”. It felt entitled to what it craved. We all crave the perfect connection. You know, the one person we dream of being with in life, our twin, our soul mate who will swoop in with butterflies and roses and solve all life’s challenges. C’mon in our naivete’ we all dream of that. If only…
Reminiscing of that silly time made me understand a lot about love and connection. I was searching for an illusion I created out of a misguided ideal. In my search for the connection I was in fact disconnecting. My judgement of anything less than ideal disconnected me from love and gratitude for what is real. A couple of times I was even angry and frustrated at a disappointing experience from a slice that didn’t live up to expectations. Don’t laugh. I know we have all been there.
The emotions and pattern of my perfect pizza search was a mirror for the way I had searched for friends and partners. In my critical judgement, I was not aware and appreciative of some wonderful people. Maybe I could have been more loving and kind if I connected without judgement. And maybe I would have had more experiences made richer by qualities in people I never really gave a chance. Just like the rubbery crusted pizza’s I threw in the dumpster- some had a fine sauce!
I often complained of loneliness and feeling disconnected but in fact I was in part doing that to myself. When we reject and judge we are in fact sometimes disconnecting from love. Someone slightly wounds us and we become rigid and refuse to forgive and so we ignore their overtures of friendship, when they may be a truly loving person who simply miss stepped. But we judge harshly and exclude them from our life. I have done that. I have had it done to me.
What makes us tolerate injustice from some and harshly exclude others? Usually the more harshly judged are our mirrors. They push on a sore we need to heal. Exclusion can often hurt, not just the one excluded. In our separation, we disconnect from the one thing that is real – love and become lost in the illusion of our judgements. Judgements that prevent us from having love and compassion for ourselves and our wounds. Of course, I am not referring to people who do us egregious harm that do not serve us. That is not judgement but discernment. I am talking about judging harshly family and friends who love us and who we may still have purpose with and who we may enrich each other’s lives in connection. Separation is sometimes just another form of judgement. Maybe those rubbery crusted pizza's reminded me too much of my own weaknesses.
And thus, we become morally outraged. We have certainly seen enough of that with the current political climate for instance. There are many lifelong friends falling out with moral outrage over different beliefs. There is no room for compassion when you are morally outraged. It breeds hate, anger, prejudice and finally separation and disconnection from love.
Love is true compassion. True compassion is when we embrace ourselves or someone else - faults and all and accept what is. Compassion is love without being tied to an outcome. Compassion is love for the sake of loving. Compassion is gratitude for the opportunity to love another like that. This connects us to all things. Expectation for an outcome and predictions of negative intent disconnect us, it puts us in separation and brings loneliness.
There is an awful lot of pizza I wasted. I threw a lot of lonely slices in the dumpster. Maybe I should have just eaten the crust or the cheese and accepted the good parts. My mind was so critical of the experience, that the good part was ruined. If I had not been looking for the fault I would have enjoyed a lot of slices. Now a days, I love all pizza. I embrace even the rubberiest crust. It’s all good. I am so grateful for every slice of hot gooey crispy goodness. I mean really what’s a bad pizza?? I LOVE ALL PIZZA!
And I love everybody. I offer friendship to everyone. I exclude and turn my back on no one that has good intention. Friendship transcends all. I am connected. I am compassion. I am not judgement. I am free. And pizza taught it all to me. I guess I found the perfect pizza after all!
Peace and love,
The Day My Work Began
In the very first blog I ever wrote in April of 2014, I told the story of the day I attempted to make my last one on earth - April 5 of 2011. It was the worst day and the best day of my entire life! It was the day my work began. In fact, 3 years later. my business Georgia Rose Connection was started on the anniversary of that date which I count as my real birthday. Obviously, I failed at my attempt to die that day and it was a good thing that my life continued, because the Universe sure had a lot more to give me. I did not know it then, but there would be much more love and joy to come than I had ever known before or could have believed possible. There were wonderful gifts to come from the source of light that created my life and who, unknown to me had complete control over it. A source that has many names, God, Spirit, Buddha, Jesus, Allah, Yahweh and yet remains nameless.
But on that day 6 years ago, overtaken by anguish and pain from extreme life events, a distorted reality had me believing there was nothing left for me but more suffering. Completely certain that I could not take one more breath from such a dark place, I welcomed death. I was so deep in grief and so consumed in pain that light had ceased to enter me. Can you imagine being in such a place and how cold and severe it would be for a soul whose only mistake was loving and trusting the wrong things and people? For a person to house a soul that has lost all hope of ever knowing love and compassion is indeed a depth of misery few can fathom.
Although life went on for me, it is indeed true that loneliness and deprivation killed me in part. It killed a sad victim, a soul with a selfish tunnel vision that could not see past her grieving heart. You see, at what could have been the final seconds of my life I survived, but I survived because I suddenly remembered someone that would care about this moment. A family member was scheduled to give birth that day. And I could not do the unspeakable to them. And so, I found myself in a panic trying to paddle back from the brink of completing an act that was truly unfathomable. I fought to live for another human and that love pulled me back into life. The light of love cracked my darkness and I followed its path. Looking back I realize I went "into service" in that moment. Someone else became greater than myself. The dot I was living in expanded to include compassion and empathy for another and it saved me.
But what pulled through was not the energy of "Georgia" that had served me through this lifetime thus far- no she died that day. She finally succumbed to the lonely empty darkness of her life as the knowledge that things could not continue as they had been stole the last breath from her wounded body. And miraculously, a renewed soul emerged - her energy was named Georgia Rose. This new soul had found in her most desperate moment, the light of love and compassion that the old part of her could not understand. A new identity was created in the compassion and forgiveness of love. In effect Source, God, Spirit had not allowed me to die but recreated me. This completely new and naked Georgia Rose now had to find her purpose and her way in the world. But the Universe supported my journey to find love for myself and meaning and purpose to my life because it was my intention from my first breath to share what I learn with the world for the benefit of all other beings. My breakdown, break through and break out could never be just for me. It was and had to be for everyone in the world.
People often talk of loneliness to me and of being alone. It is not for me to judge their pain or negate their suffering but part of me thinks that few of us know what it really is to be completely and utterly alone. To feel so alone that you have no reason to go on is truly a deep misery.
I tried not to kill myself. Suicide is not a cowardice, on the contrary it is a distortion of valor where you try desperately to find courage to go on and run out of the strength you are seeking. I remember going to yoga in a fog that morning thinking -just get around people, anyone even strangers, so you can’t hurt yourself. But when the class ended there I was facing the losses and the “alone”, again. It hurt too much to bear another second of it. When I drove home and hit the garage door button and pulled into the house I knew, I knew my life was over. There was absolutely no one to call. No one could help me. I literally wracked my brain for someone to reach out to and there…. was…simply….no…one. There Was Silence. There Was Nothing.
Some people feel the absence of a partner or companion to be excruciating, although they are surrounded by a loving family. I understand feeling alone in a crowd and I also know for some of us that is just a human condition. Feeling separate is much different than an acute loneliness that eats you out from the bowels of your body. That loneliness is a depth of hell I wish on no one. In fact, much of my work is dedicated to that condition. I do this work for the collective people of the world.
What exactly is my “work”?
I started Georgia Rose Connection in 2014 on the anniversary of my “real” birthday because it is a day of deep meaning for me. What saved me that day so long ago was feeling a connection to something greater than myself. That connection to love, to Spirit- felt in the nick of time -is why I am here gratefully breathing in every new day. I can not squander that amazing gift!
Our connections are all we have to save us and source us in this life. Our souls need love to survive. I know that better than most! And so my mission is to help souls connect. Since the day, I was reconnected to my soul through the energy of love it is my mission to put love where there is none by sharing my experiences and wisdom and gifts. In short, by sharing my connection to love and other dimensions I hope it strengthens your connections in this lifetime with love and purpose.
We must connect with love, with each other , with our souls and most importantly with Spirit and the source of our creation to feel complete. In this connection we are all united as one collective. In these connections we find joy and our purpose in this world. Through these connections of love we heal each other and the universe.
It is the darkness and lack of those connections which causes the separation and loneliness that is at the root of so much suffering in this world.
When I triumphed over death that day I did not just do it for me. In my panic when I realized what I was doing, I prayed to every soul that had been where I was and had triumphed over their pain to send me the energy of that triumph. I was filled with the energy of renewed strength and victory. I then in turn sent that energy to every living being in the same place as I was. I do not know how I knew to do this but I did and it connected me to love and put me in service to the world. That mere happening is proof of Spirits connection and how much He loves us. In that bigger picture my responsibility was clear. I had to get straight, because my lesson of suffering was not just mine, what I learned from it would reverberate around every soul in the universe. I had to love myself for every being in the world that was suffering and then I had to send that love to them. In this we are all connected.
Thus, Georgia Rose Connection was created. Using my connection to Spirit, other dimensions and the Angelic realm it is my intention to connect you to love and healing. In this, we all heal each other.
Peace and love,
Spiritual Healer, Energetic Medium
This Blog is the story of the miracles, challenges and lessons of my life journey. Years ago when I hit a personal "rock bottom" my despair led me to seek answers and my quest for truth began. Amazing events propelled me on a spiritual journey of transformation.. Miraculously, through these experiences my life has become my teacher and my friend.... I hope my words connect us and allow us to walk together for a time as teacher and friend to each other. The most valuable thing we have during this human experience is our connection to love. The love in our soul for a higher power and others is the only thing that is real. I honor these connections through my writing. Theses words are my gift inspired through the heart of Spirit for you. I hope by sharing my journey it will enlighten, inspire and ease yours as it does mine >> ... Peace... Georgia Rose