MY LIFE: From 1995 - 2010 I was purpose driven. Amassing all the material things one could have and achieving all the goals I set for myself in my business. I was and still am a driven person. I missed a lot in those years- birthdays and weddings and friendships that fell by the wayside because I had no time. I even forgot my own wedding anniversary once.
A beautiful life grew out of control as the pressure to perform mounted. By 2010 the pressure had grown to my breaking point - it was almost impossible to do all I had to in a normal day. I owned rental houses and flipped properties, I had 2 real estate offices and many many employees, an electrical contracting business and 2 sick elderly parents, a demanding husband and way too many things. Life was unraveling. When I lost my parents and I got cancer, things began to change inside me. As life and grief does to many of us it shifted me. The Universe slowed me so I could see clearly.
Cancer was my awakening. It was the tipping point that brought incredible loss and incredible triumph. I learned a deeper way of life and realized that I had not ever been fully present before. When faced with ones own mortality and impermanence shit gets real! I became understanding of a heart I had ignored, I embraced the vulnerability and fear I had always squashed with steely resolve. As I had to depend on the kindness of strangers to save my life - I felt my human condition in the soft places where I had before pretended to be super human. My determination was now to feel all the things I had been determined to make numb before. For the first time, I allowed myself deep breath and introspection. I began a journey steered by my heart. I left the safety of a ship my ego created and went swimming for a better one with real meaning. I dove deep into an ocean. I found a life that was finally about me, not the doing and getting and chasing and pleasing of the others. I slowly slowly stopped the wheel of shame and grief that had been silently invisibly spinning me all my life. I now saw what was visible. I now saw life was about more and that we are not driven by purpose but we become the purpose we are meant to be.
By finding myself - the real one not the one running from my fears, I found purpose. Purpose that had its root in the world not just me. My purpose became to put love where there is none. By 2014 I had completely stopped the world as I had previously known it. I meditated and did healings and connected with readings and took months off, no work, no schedule and no one to please, and nothing to do. It was beautiful to do "nothing" but feed my spirit and let my psychic gifts come forward unleashed. I backpacked and walked by the ocean ate ice cream and took naps and continued my spiritual studies full on. I met amazing people and traveled and danced and laughed and did Yoga. Nothing drove me but what my heart wanted. After such a high powered life in the 3D world I had fully achieved 5D status! it was amazing and free.
But I am an extreme person. So, eventually as it had before the pendulum swung too much in the opposite direction. I started to grow lazy and too soft without any structure at all I was a bit lost yet completely grounded. But I had no plan no future direction and that did not feel right. Money was getting low and I was sleeping in too much and getting bored. I started to question my bohemian hippy like indulgences and realize I needed balance of some kind. Was I being wasteful of my talents? Should I be out in the world more?
Of course, that is when the Universe unexpectedly called. It made me an offer I could not refuse. An offer that gave me stability and the chance to blend my old high powered career with my heart. It offered a way to help people achieve goals and empower lives while gaining financial stability. I was a bit hesitant - this would entrench me back in the 3 D world and I had this fantasy of working in the 5th dimension.
I decided to do it. I dusted off my suits and hung up my back pack to go back to the rooms where I had once been. The rooms where egos are grown and deals are made and people jockey for recognition on the throne of competition. I took the position I currently work at. I challenged myself to go back to the halls of "me first" and " fight to the death" and bring a different energy there. I challenged myself to go there and remain me - true to my soul.
I promised I would find a way to do both.
My personal office sits in the middle of sterile and bland corporate America. It is decorated beautifully with inspiring quotes and pretty pictures and low lighting and meditation music playing all day. It doesn't really fit in with the motif. And I don't care! It is a real place in a world of the unreal. It is an oasis in the desert. Strange things happen here.
Officially on the outside anyone walking in would see an executive. I am looked up to and sought after for career advice, I am Senior Vice President and I settle disputes and make decisions and train and educate. But to be honest none of that means much to me except that I am proud of my hard work and grateful God gave me the brain I have. Other than that it has no significance for me.
What is significant to me is that since taking the position I have done things I never did at work before. People are somehow drawn to me and my space. I find myself often drying tears, listening to personal stories, inspiring change, lighting a way, changing lives. Co workers - light workers in disguise are coming in asking "you are a healer, aren't you"? "You seem to know things" "You have an energy about you" "who are you". Among us there are reiki workers, psychics, feng shui experts, seers, visionaries etc... some days my mouth hangs open in disbelief. The things and synchronicity that occur are unbelievable.
I sit in my little corner of the world and I see it all unfolding before me. This new world. It is our world the world of every one of us and it is not about me or you it is about US!
I marvel at where God has brought me. Some days just when the 3D world seems to be strangling me something occurs that shows me I am meant to be here for now. The pixie dust is raining down on me, this place and everyone in it. And I know it is that way in many places such as this all over the universe.
The first holiday season I was here there were no decorations and not much cheer except the obligatory office party which was a rather solemn affair. This past year there was a big tree and decorations and merry making and silly pictures and love. Its flowing here now with laughter and compassion is finding its way in. It is beautiful to watch.
There are times I am still the barracuda in the business world when I have to be,but now I do so always being true to my heart.
I still go home and meditate and do my Reiki circles and readings. I make time to write the books soon to be published. At times the 3D world demands more of my attention than I want it to, like when I have a quarterly meeting event or deadline. I neglect calling friends back and I miss things I would like to do , I fall behind on my writing and spiritual studies. I know that is wrong friends get mad and I get frustrated. In my humanness I must sometimes choose and my choices are not infallible. But I usually correct that as soon as I am able. I am still trying to find balance. I try to stay true to my goal of creating a spiritual community and inspiring the world through writing and video. The time I spend at this endeavor is my classroom and my content platform. I am building my audience my followers and creating the space that hopefully will eventually allow that goal. I am on my path.
My path is like many. Whatever our daily life is we can bring our spirit to it and enlighten ourselves and others just by being love. That is the purpose of this world. I understand that now. Whether we do that on a mountaintop or wherever. Love the place you're in!
The other day a woman came up to me in the ladies room and said "You know you changed my life, that conversation we had a few months ago". I'd be lying if I said this high powered executive barracuda didn't lock herself in a stall and start crying. I was crying because it was a beautiful moment. But mostly I cried because I felt so blessed that God gave me such a fulfilling life. I have cried from shame and jealousy and loss. I have grieved so much I thought I had no tears left. Out of all those tears shed, the ones I feel the most deeply are the tears of humility. I am so humbled that I get to see what is real in this world. I hardly deserve to see such beauty and yet I am rewarded with it often. That makes me cry the hardest to feel such GRACE!
And something tells me this scene is playing out all over corporate America and the world. The world is changing or maybe its always been this way and I never knew!
Sending the intention of beautiful heightened awareness out to all of you...
Peace and love,
Spiritual Healer, Energetic Medium
This Blog is the story of the miracles, challenges and lessons of my life journey. Years ago when I hit a personal "rock bottom" my despair led me to seek answers and my quest for truth began. Amazing events propelled me on a spiritual journey of transformation.. Miraculously, through these experiences my life has become my teacher and my friend.... I hope my words connect us and allow us to walk together for a time as teacher and friend to each other. The most valuable thing we have during this human experience is our connection to love. The love in our soul for a higher power and others is the only thing that is real. I honor these connections through my writing. Theses words are my gift inspired through the heart of Spirit for you. I hope by sharing my journey it will enlighten, inspire and ease yours as it does mine >> ... Peace... Georgia Rose