In mid 2014 a relationship in my life ended. It was just another log on the fire fueling my transformation. But it was a major log. After much soul searching I realized the circumstances surrounding this loss were mainly because of fear in one way or another. In turn that gave me the realization that everything negative in my life was being caused by fear in one way or another. Poor choices and blocked emotions and walls made from the wounds of other wars had denied me a connection that could have been…
I decided I needed a new approach to life. I would no longer live in a fear based consciousness. I wanted to live in love. I took this goal so seriously I was a relentless and strong task master with myself. Truth and vulnerability became a very sharp sword as I cut through a lifetime of illusion and fear. I began clearing things that no longer served me, even though I wanted to keep them just in case.
I completed unfinished business. I tied up loose ends that I had left undone so just so I could indulge in the distraction and tempting fantasy of their completion. Sometimes that completion meant I said goodbye to people I loved. I had to discern who enabled the poor coping mechanisms that only served to feed the fears and compulsions that proved my unworthiness from the ones who were healthy for me. I released and cleared and purged till the very gut of me was on the floor and my head spun in a groundless wonder.
At first it felt like I was falling through the floor but I brutally stuck with it because instinct told me going back was the WRONG way. I had tried that way with disastrous results, better to keep moving forward. I was reaching for something in another dimension, but I wasn’t sure I knew exactly what that would feel like. And then things started to change the fear got less and then there was no fear… I let it all go and I trusted the unknown. I surrendered. And the groundless spinning became peaceful and full of promise. The slate was blank and beautiful. My world became very quite.
I needed that quite. In the quiet I began to remember. Yes I remembered… the space before the fear. I connected with the place before I was born. I remembered pure love. I had purged my life successfully. I felt the source of my creation. I was now living from my soul. I had entered another dimension.
This journal entry from September 2015 sums up how it felt to breakthrough:
Everything is changing. Everything I guess stems from my consciousness, your brain really does change everything. I see the external world differently now like my eyes are a camera. All colors are so vivid and the world is more alive. It’s been like that for months. I see differently inside too. I don’t get angry or upset nearly as much. Positive emotions happiness, peace, compassion and especially love seem to outweigh negative as I observe all aspects of a situation. My first reactions have become love and healing energy. My purpose and priority is to make things better grow, elevate. Ascend.
This is ascension. I have been like this for months. Meditations are deep and filled with immense unconditional love. My knowledge of astrology has grown exponentially as though I am connected to all the planets in the universe and their energy. The energy of the earth and moon and its cycles has a great effect on me and connects me with our creator and other realms in different ways depending on the energy. I can harness this for my higher good. It is yet another channel another tool to tap in and connect to life to love. I experience the energy of complete oneness with the universe when I study the planets.
My day to day routine and earthly worries like finances and personal drama have become faded subplots as the important things in my heart take over. Love. Compassion. Healing. Helping others. I don’t worry and I feel relaxed all the time. My pace is slower and I enjoy more. I have come to know true freedom. I love beautiful things with no attachment but with simple gratitude for their existence. It is the same with people too.
I live in a different world now. In this world time and space fade and recede into the back ground and heart and emotion and soul connections are in the for front. Things seem to have a natural rythym that I am content to allow. Everything is in sync with no effort from me. I realize I have reached the 5th dimension.
The 3rd dimension is where I lived in fear and anger on this earth. Survival mode. Duality. Everything is good or bad in the 3rd dimension. But I understand now I can’t love in survival mode, I am too busy surviving. Like a prize fighter with both fists cocked wondering who would throw the next punch life had become a series of punching and ducking for cover. That was no way for me to live.
This is very different. This new world, this new consciousness is much more rewarding. Without the worry of injury I am free to enjoy life. Now things just are… I have no judgment. I see beauty. I see love. I am love. I no longer live in a dimension where I am struggling and pushing against life lost in the illusion of it all. I realize I have even passed through the 4th dimension where I became very comfortable with change without fear. The 4th dimension was my training camp for a long time. It taught me how to push my boundaries and lean into all the sharp edges of my life to find what serves me and what does not. It is a beautiful and tragic classroom in the school of life. Purging 101 is quite a challenge! But it is in this clearing that I found my soul.
I am living in the 5th dimension. This is a beautiful place where one can move freely and easily through life with no comparisons and measurements. It is a safe place where I am trusting who I am and surrendering to what I will become, even when what is happening to me does not make sense in the moment. I trust because I know I am supported by a non physical realm. It is in knowing that I am a physical being, becoming a non physical being in a physical realm that puts all in perspective for me. This knowledge makes life sweeter, larger. I cherish everything, every emotion and experience even if it is challenging and hard. I know I am having it for a higher reason and it will bring me good in some way. And ultimately I feel grateful for that consciousness. It is all love. Only love is real.
The best part is that my journey continues and I am looking forward to every minute. I now find beauty within everything. When you do that fear becomes powerless. There is nothing more powerful than our connection to our soul.
Live from your soul.
Peace and love,
This past year I took a lot of time off. Off from a hectic , crazy life of controlled chaos as I knew it for some 20 odd years and I relished doing nothing. I slept and I ate sweet foods and I danced and I meditated and I played with my dog and backpacked around Fire Island and hiked in the woods and by the ocean. I traveled and read and wrote, tuned in and paid attention. I was lazy and full of energy and did whatever moved me. I didn't have a partner and I did all this alone and it felt just right.
It was peaceful and satisfying, spiritually fulfilling and I fell in love with myself and life. I saw things in detail and my mind was open to I see a grander scale and I started to really feel things deeply. I could feel it all in my body, people, nature, animals, words, causes and their effects.
The more I paid attention the more I could feel. In the space just under my heart in the middle of my rib cage , in my core, the place I call my soul space, all of life began to resonate with me. I discovered such beauty in the world. And each day I claimed the beauty of the universe as my gift from our creator and as I did so little by little I saw the beauty within myself. And I claimed that too. I owned my amazing self and acknowledged the gorgeous sweet energy of loving me. And so I gave love to the world and took love inside of me, for myself too.
One afternoon in early fall I went to the beach. I was feeling healthy and fit and lazy all at once. I began to do some yoga and then felt a childlike enthusiasm bubble up inside.
Under a sizzling sun my feet kicked up the sands of time and my arms outstretched to the oceans of eternity and I spun and spun and laughed until it all collided. Then dizzy with joy I collapsed to the earth and surrendered to the universe.
From a magnificent blue sky spinning clouds of clarity slowly rained into my mind as dense solid earth seeped into my back and through my body. I felt grounded in the vibrations from above and below. I was no longer giving love or taking love I simply became love. I lay on the ground, embraced by the world, surrounded by love and I became one with everything. I knew what it was to BE love. The earth was spinning round and round and I was safe in its arms. Tears washed my face and I knew I would live "in love" the rest of my life.
I lay on the sand a long time like a baby in a safe cradle. I was amazed and content to let the universe heal a lifetime of anxiety and uncertainty. I felt a newness, a safe place. I became aware that I had never felt safe before and it mattered not because only now was important not anything before.
After a while the tide started to lick my toes and it felt like a kiss from God, assuring me this was real. I had ascended to the consciousness meant for us all. Sheer bliss! Contentedly I stretched and sat up under a glowing orange and purple sunset. I picked up my back pack to head for home. I had never felt this safe before, and something told me this feeling would now be a permanent companion.. Everything in the world was the same but different. I had experienced something that changed everything. My life felt different now.
I had felt my soul become one with all. I would live from this place now. Everything I do and become, all I have and all that I am would be sourced from here. From this confident knowingness of what is real. I left the beach that day knowing I would simply ... be love. No matter what, I could not live any other way.
All my life I had searched, struggled and fought for stability and here it was filling every cell of my body. All I had to do was take the time to let go and surrender, so it could come to me. I was confident now, assured and ready for my next chapter with no fear. I felt...safe.
I had no idea the what would come next but I knew I something awesome was coming!
And I was right... Synchronicity was in progress...as it always is...😊
Peace and love,
Spiritual Healer, Energetic Medium
This Blog is the story of the miracles, challenges and lessons of my life journey. Years ago when I hit a personal "rock bottom" my despair led me to seek answers and my quest for truth began. Amazing events propelled me on a spiritual journey of transformation.. Miraculously, through these experiences my life has become my teacher and my friend.... I hope my words connect us and allow us to walk together for a time as teacher and friend to each other. The most valuable thing we have during this human experience is our connection to love. The love in our soul for a higher power and others is the only thing that is real. I honor these connections through my writing. Theses words are my gift inspired through the heart of Spirit for you. I hope by sharing my journey it will enlighten, inspire and ease yours as it does mine >> ... Peace... Georgia Rose